Strange things that happen during NC - coincidences? Share yours.

[Depression = 72% of members]

So, apart from sending an apology email last week (for my own peace of mind) to my friend, I have been NC for nearly 5 weeks.

Now when we have been NC before, I noticed strange things such as multiple FB accounts appearing in his name but no photo's attached, and that happened each time I blocked a new one. After 5 new profiles and each one being blocked by me this stopped happening.  His name also then started to appear linked to a Zumba page that I go to but he wasn't on FB at the time... within weeks he had re-established contact.  I also had a very weird call at work, from the Waldorf Astoria Hotel in London (caller ID came up and I googled it) and I had a feeling that was him too, whilst on location filming.

So on Monday I wake up to an email from FB saying 'Insideoutside, get back on Facebook with one click' and when I opened it, it said it looks like you are having trouble remembering your password.  Erm, no I haven't.  I had several like this last year too during NC.

Today at 10.25 I get a call from a No Caller Id number.  Ok, might just be a coincidence but 1. I haven't had a call from a no caller ID since July (again when we weren't talking) and 2.  It was around the time he would normally text me if he was going to.

I have him blocked on text and calls and his emails are set to go to trash as I am not interested in resuming any friendship with him again.

So what weird things have happened to you and do you think they were coincidences or does your gut tell you otherwise?  Just interested really to see how we all compare.

[insideoutside]

So, apart from sending an apology email last week (for my own peace of mind) to my friend, I have been NC for nearly 5 weeks.

Now when we have been NC before, I noticed strange things such as multiple FB accounts appearing in his name but no photo's attached, and that happened each time I blocked a new one. After 5 new profiles and each one being blocked by me this stopped happening.  His name also then started to appear linked to a Zumba page that I go to but he wasn't on FB at the time... within weeks he had re-established contact.  I also had a very weird call at work, from the Waldorf Astoria Hotel in London (caller ID came up and I googled it) and I had a feeling that was him too, whilst on location filming.

So on Monday I wake up to an email from FB saying 'Insideoutside, get back on Facebook with one click' and when I opened it, it said it looks like you are having trouble remembering your password.  Erm, no I haven't.  I had several like this last year too during NC.

Today at 10.25 I get a call from a No Caller Id number.  Ok, might just be a coincidence but 1. I haven't had a call from a no caller ID since July (again when we weren't talking) and 2.  It was around the time he would normally text me if he was going to.

I have him blocked on text and calls and his emails are set to go to trash as I am not interested in resuming any friendship with him again.

So what weird things have happened to you and do you think they were coincidences or does your gut tell you otherwise?  Just interested really to see how we all compare.

[TheGirthMachine]

Yeah that definitely sounds like you're being stalked! How come you have decided to end your friendship?

Ok, I literally had hundreds of strange things that happened after I finished my undiagnosed BPD ex gf, but I'll just share a couple. Come to think of it they weren't really strange they were more abusive haha.

She started a smear campaign on twitter which lasted about 6 months until she got a new boyfriend. She started posting tweets about how she just pretends im dead and this has resulted in her life being amazing. She would also post a lot of tweets about how amazing her life is since I split up with her and she kept trying to get a hashtag of #ImWinningShugz trending .

But then sometimes it was as though she was trying to reach out to me and kept tweeting some of my favorite lyrics! She doesn't know the band she just knew I loved them so it was really weird! Then literally after her putting these lyrics, a few days later she would tweet about how im a 'c u n t' and a 'psychopath' :/ You could literally see the flip between love and hate from tweet to tweet! Mainly hate however!

As soon as she got her new bf, she was posting pics of them after two weeks of dating saying he's the love of her life and showing pics of them kissing . Then she would take him to all the places we used to go, take pics of them both there, and then share them for everyone to see. It was crazy but kinda funny. I feel really sorry for the dude as he has no idea!

She then became friends with my ex on social media and started messaging her (who she didnt know and never met but absolutely hated just cus she was an ex years before her). God knows what went on there but my ex without BPD, her mate spoke to me and just said how psycho the BPD ex was.

[lighthouse9]

Been there with an ex (not current STBXw) who I also suspected to be BPD or maybe ASD.

She would make profiles on a dating site to message me and told me my profile was "so me." We worked together, and even though I had strict NC controls in place, she really didn't need to resort to a dating site to find me. She had ended the relationship, after a major affair, but yet finding me on a dating site seemed to be appropriate to her somehow.

I also managed to set up first dates with a few women who ended up being catfish accounts. After reviewing the messages, I started to suspect that they were her as well. It was bizarre, to say the least.

Definitely familiarize yourself with any laws around stalking or restraining orders/ no contact orders if you're feeling like this might get unsafe. I didn't think it would, but then it did. Nothing ever *happened* but the threatening gestures were enough to drive me crazy and make me sleep with one eye open.

[Insom]

Hi, insideoutside!

It sounds like, in the absence of contact, you're looking for evidence that he is still thinking about you.  A lot of us here, me included, can relate with wanting to feel remembered by someone who meant a lot even when the relationship had problems.

What if he is thinking about you? How does that make you feel?

Other than wondering if he is pinging you, how are things going with you and your family this week?

[insideoutside]

Hi, insideoutside!

It sounds like, in the absence of contact, you're looking for evidence that he is still thinking about you.  A lot of us here, me included, can relate with wanting to feel remembered by someone who meant a lot even when the relationship had problems.

What if he is thinking about you? How does that make you feel?

Other than wondering if he is pinging you, how are things going with you and your family this week?

Maybe; but I never get these oddities when we are in contact.  Ever.  When I saw the no caller ID pop up on my phone today I got a bit anxious and my gut was saying it was him.  Who knows but it’s sure strange how these things happen when we are in NC.

I’m good and so is my family.  Thank you for asking x

[The Cat in d Hat]

I can relate to this. It’s been 6 weeks and not a peep from her. I’ve been getting a few calls from random numbers, won’t leave voicemail. As much as part of me wants it to be her (of course I wouldn’t know what to do if it was her), realistically I understand its probably just telemarketers.

We’re looking for validation, that they miss us like we do. But it’s probably just out of sight out of mind for her.

[southside420]

I definitely have had strange things happening. I cut off my ex almost 2 weeks ago and told her I had nothing left and did not want to explore a future with her. On Wednesday of this week, I had a strange instagram "food" account follow me. The picture looked like someone wearing a shirt she used to wear. I accepted the follower request out of curiosity and requested to follow back. It began looking at my live photos but did not let me follow. The account ended up following the only female I had followed in the 4 months since I have seen her, and it isn't a girl I am dating or even seeing.

I am 99.9% sure that account is her. Very few photos. She also blocked me on Venmo last night it looks like, which is random and odd.

I have not broke NC and am still going to therapy every Monday, and I don't plan to contact her anytime soon, if ever again. I'm sure she's already knee deep in a new relationship with the new person she said she was seeing, but I wish she'd just leave me alone.

[insideoutside]

I’m glad I’m not the only one who thinks things during NC aren’t just coincidences.

On Friday, minutes before my scheduled lunch break, I got another call from no caller ID.  I didn’t answer it.  I haven’t received any over the weekend, so who knows.  Maybe it was a marketing call; the timings of these calls make me think otherwise though and my gut thinks it was him.

[stixx44]

When I went NC a few months ago (but didn’t block her), I’d get weird texts from her that “supposedly”were to be sent to another person but were sent to me by mistake.  Really?  Three mistake texts in a 10-minute period?  One I can see but not three.

Also received a text last week from her best friend wishing me a happy birthday and then a follow-up text with the message “Is there something wrong with your phone?”  (My ex was blocked on my phone). I’m thinking maybe she used her friend’s phone to contact me.  Don’t know, don’t care.

It’s all a game to them.  Childish and immature.

[tlc232]

Hi all -- I am seeing a pattern of what my T would call the behavior of a 4 year old.   Going through this, she suggested that I treat the behaviors that I am experiencing to how you would respond to a 4 yo.   Not acknowledging or recognizing it.   Except... .I found my ex (unBPDSO) breaking into my home when I was at work this past week.   It's hard to ignore something like that, and it ended with 2 calls to the local sheriff's office because he lied to the first officer saying he lived there (he is still using my home address on his driver's license).   It was a long day and a rush to get home -- embarrassment all the way around.   

After that incident, I had a phone call from local state police days later (retaliatory) stating they were charging me with firearm violation for stealing a gun that he had left behind (he left a lot of things behind and I have no idea what as we are still in the trying to get all things sifted phase after a long 5-6 mos.).   So while the behavior is indeed still like a 4 yo... .I wish he would just stalk on FB.    I'm done with it all -- no contact has turned into vengeful behavior... .