Being fixated on my own weaknesses is a sort of red herring I've created for myself. I chose to be with people who were happy to keep me chasing after that red herring
For me it was about what to do with that herring if I ever caught it. I mean, chasing perfection is good and all, but what if I ever achieved it? It scared me at one point, I probably messed up a relationship because of it.
In the end I'm seeing it not like "stop doing it" and more like "choose the best path to it".
I don't like giving up on something potentially good just because it might be unachievable. A few years back everyone knew it was impossible to fly, and now we're planning on sending people to other planets.
And if I don't ever get my "perfect" then at least I'm ok with having chosen the journey I thought was best for me.
I've had a mental image popping up in my head lately of a car spinning its wheels in the mud
Its actually a lot of fun to splash dirt everywhere just because, but it becomes a problem when you think you're actually getting somewhere when you notice "a change, a movement" of the sinking vehicle