I need guidance...

[Homebody]

I'm new here and I am confident that my husband has borderline personality disorder.  I left him in February of this year after we got into a very heated argument.  But now that I am away from him, I feel as if I can go back and make things work (that is, if he would take me back).
This is not the first time I left him.  It's probably the 5th or 6th time.
I'm just looking for some guidance and need to know that I'm not alone suffering through this.

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Ozzie101]

Hi Homebody and welcome!

You're definitely not alone. You've found a supportive community of people who "get it." Each relationship is different, but there are some similarities and sharing those helps us feel less alone and helps us deal with our situations.

I hope you don't mind if I ask a few questions. It helps us know better how to help you.

How long have you and your H been together? You say you've left several times before. Is there anything about this time that distinguishes it from others? It's been 8 months. Is that typical for you? When you've gotten back together in the past, how has that gone about (were you the one who reached out or was he)?

[Homebody]

Hi~

Thanks for your response.
We've been married for 14 years.
There isn't anything about this time that makes me leaving unique.  I just feel that I should have put up a little more of a fight instead of being so quick to leave.
In the past when I have left, we have been separated on an average of about 1 year at a time.

[Harri]

Hi.

Can you tell us what did prompt your leaving?  Or describe your relationship so we can have a better idea of the conflicts you experience?  Details will help even if you give just one example it will give us something to work on.  

I understand that getting back together is your goal.  Is that correct?  We have several tools here that can help improve things and make getting back together more viable.  While you have been separated, have you worked on relationship skills for example?  

Please share more.  In the meantime, we have a lot of great articles you may find helpful here: https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=334610.0  Start anywhere and see what resonates and then we can talk about it if you want.