Tempted to ask my ex to leave

[Unsure101]

I didn't want it to get to this point but I don't feel I have a choice.

I'm struggling to deal with her messing with my emotions , and it's making me feel depressed.

Like the other night we were intimate in bed together, then she didn't return home last night, till briefly this morning, I asked where was she, and she said she spent the night at a guys house. She said she didn't sleep with him, but let's be honest, I'm not an idiot, and you wouldn't just sleep there.

I raised the issue before when she went on a date with him, and she said well we're not together, so it's not your concern, but then I go fine I'll do the same what you're doing to me, and she just says, well that'll hurt her, and they may not even get serious ?

But then the next minute , she's like can I have a hug and a cuddle and acts like it's no big deal ?

I'm really struggling here, I've turned do many girls down because I want this to work but I feel like it's just too much.

Even my sister says what exactly are you doing, and you're not getting any younger, if you want a family like I do she said she wouldn't carry on wasting my time here.




I just want to have fun, and this really isn't fun for me.

I mean in some ways, if we ignore the sex, I feel more like her parent with the way she acts.

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

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[Unsure101]

Can someone offer me advice please , I'm really struggling here

Today she told me , she's finished with the guy she was briefly seeing , she said he didn't understand her and get her , do I thought that was the end of it and we could move on.

Now tonight , when I got back from work she was already up, and dressed which was unusual as it's the middle of the night, anyway, I asked her is she going somewhere, I only asked her as a joke really, or thought she might be up early to ask me to make her food or something, but then she told me she's going out to see this guy , baring in mind we had sex twice today, I honestly feel like she's talking the piss now, I feel like pulling the carpet from underneath her and asking her to move out.

I'm really struggling to deal with these emotions.

[GoldenBubble]

This could be a manipulation to test if you "care". My H tests me by flirting or staring at women in front of me. Or he talks about his ex wife. I think he wants to see if I get upset. If I do then he believes I care about him. I actually returned the favor a few times and he freaked out because men will actually approach me in front of him. Maybe not mature but great for teaching him empathy.

I wouldn't act concerned but set boundaries like "If you are living with me you are exclusive with me. That includes not saying you seeing someone if you really aren't. If you can't do that please move out." But that's just me.

[Unsure101]

Thing is , this is a complete joke. This isn't normal behaviour, not in my books anyway.

I'm becoming ashamed of the whole situation , like if my family or friends found out , they'd be like what are you even doing with this girl, she's just using you for emotional support, and a place to crash.

This is so far away from the ideal relationship I had, I know every relationship has issues, but this is something else.

She seems to have got it in her, that's it's normal to be sharing a bed naked, then go and sleep round this other guys.

I'm not sure who's the biggest idiot, me or him , like do you reckon he even knows she's still living here with me or what ?

[Unsure101]

She acts like this is nothing, she told me today he does her head in, and she's not even sure why she's going there.

Can I also ask, if your husband does that to you, why are you still with him ?

[Unsure101]

I don't know how to act anymore

This is the lowest I've felt in years, I feel like getting blind drunk, I would if my friends weren't busy in all honesty.

It's like she's deliberately set this situation up so I have absolutely no come back, like today I found out the guy she's seeing , she's having sex with him, ok, I don't know 100%, but the pack of condom's in the drawer is gone.

However if I have a go, she's just gonna tell me, what's the issue, we're not together at the moment anyway, but then she tells me like she's confused, like last night I was giving her an all over body massage before she vanished to his, but then she goes on about if we should order a Christmas shop soon ?

I feel like the only way to deal with this is play her at her own game, and find a girl to have fun with myself, that's the only thing that gets a reaction from her, her thinking I might play around.

But this is so messed up, if I'm being honest, it's probably best she's not here right now because I'm not happy with her actions.

But I literally have no come back do I