Welcome to bpdfamily, Husband12345!
I have three girls, now teenagers. I can relate, I still worry about how their dad and stepdad influence them. I love that you're thinking about this now. Kids absorb so much of what's around them.
It would help to know a little more, if you're willing to share. Is your wife open to counseling? Is she aware of her BPD? How have you managed her outbursts so far?
Things can get better. I'm glad you found us.

pj