Thanks Dungahass,
Some support now I'm grateful for. The bond was very deep and severing it so instantly brings similar grief to someone passing away. It's like she no longer exists.
I'll leave it tucked away in the back room then until she is ready. Another concern is that she will just leave it forever considering it abandoned.
I can feel your pain, just from your post. I know that pain, I've been there. I'm here if you wanna talk about it some more. Others on this board will too. When my ex and I broke up last year, the first few weeks were the hardest. That feeling of a sudden severance of the deep bond and constant contact was a system shock for sure. It created a void so large that I didn't know how I could survive without it. I kept saying to myself, "how could someone with such a deep bond to me discard me so quickly? Breaking up is one thing, but this? Its like I don't exist anymore, and I never mattered." I felt like everything I knew was gone in an instant, and so was the person I knew. And then came the harshest pushbacks I have ever seen from her. I didn't realize it in these terms at the time, but I was painted black, and it was gut-wrenching. It made me panic, and act out in desperation, which would just lead to more soul-crushing tongue lashings from her.
I'm not saying this to make your topic about me, but rather just to let you know that I know how you feel, and that eventually, the pain does weaken, even if a little. Hang in there, and keep your support system nearby. And post here if it helps. It's still fresh, your distress is totally normal.
I'll leave it tucked away in the back room then until she is ready. Another concern is that she will just leave it forever considering it abandoned.
I suggest you that you try not to worry too much right now about if she will leave it there forever. Perhaps just leaving it out of sight, and (sorta) out of mind is enough for now. In the other thread, you said you are worried your ex might avoid thinking about you and moving on/detaching from you. Perhaps you can borrow some of that mindset, with respect to her stuff.
I am at my ends over the break up and handling it very poorly. No sleep, emotionally wrecked, disrupted work performance etc.
I'm in a sound mind to talk to her however.
I won't pretend to know how your mind works, you know yourself better of course. But I'm not sure how both those things can be true at the same time, right now. I've been, and still are to some extent, through exactly that. The breakup and my attempts at reconciliation started affecting all aspects of my life, including work, sleep, and I was/am an emotional wreck (running off to a conference room at work so I can cry alone). And in that fragile state, I was/am SOO vulnerable to her moods/love/devaluation each time I did communicate with her. Perhaps right now a break is best, for yourself? To give yourself even just one day, or just one hour, of semi-peace? I'm not minimizing how hard it is to do that in the least, but do you think you can try?
