How is your BPD child dealing with current social isolation situation?

[1hope]

Hi everyone,
Just wondering how your child is dealing with the current social isolation situation?  My DD21 isn’t coping very well.   She says her coping strategies are now not available to her, and doesn’t know what else she can do to calm/level out.  She would normally meet up with a friend or go to the mall, but she can’t because our government is reminding us about the need for social distancing for everyone right now due to Covid19.

I have been trying to use SET, and have reminded her about some of her other strategies that she has used in the past.  She is currently in the “nothing else works” mode.  That makes it more difficult for all of us, as we are all in the house together!  My husband and I have been taking breaks by going for walks, and hope that we won’t face a total lockdown here. 

What is everyone else experiencing?

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[livednlearned]

SD23 does most of her socializing through text and that has only increased. She wanted to watch a movie with us, we let her pick it, then she texted nonstop throughout so we wandered away and she was irritated.

Before she arrived, she seemed to think people were using the virus as a reason to not allow her to visit. We let her come stay for a week and that seemed to fuel some text-based drama with other family members about how they were being mean to her. So we were split white, although she reunited with her BF at the same time so it's hard to tell if that's what brought her spirits up. Over text they decided to live together again so I guess they will be social distancing together now that she's back home.

That's nice that you and your H can walk together. SD23 doesn't like to be left behind so getting out of the house by myself with H wasn't much of an option.

How are DD21's BPD symptoms getting worse without her coping strategies?

[1hope]

Thanks for your response!  DD has been struggling at college (just recently dropped down to 3 courses from 7).  She had this week to catch up, since her college is closed, and will reopen on Monday with only online classes.  She has not done any work, is having trouble sleeping and sleeps half the day.  She is also not using any of the strategies she has learned through years of counselling, inpatient stays, and a treatment program last summer.  It is frustrating to watch.  She hasn’t lived at home since she moved out suddenly at 18, so having her at home is quite a change for us. 
Today she went outside for a walk with a friend (while keeping a safe social distance). I spoke to her about it before she went, explaining that her choices could affect all of us.  Honestly, I just hope I can trust her.  I told her in the future, she will need to use FaceTime or other social platforms.  I set a boundary, so I guess that’s a good step on my part! 

[twocrazycats]

My dd 19 is not doing very well at all. She is an extrovert and uses activity to distract her from her problems and feelings. She had been doing well and loving it. She had seemed relatively stable and happy the past month or so. And now this. Also, having to do college online reminds her of the two years in high school that she started out in school but had to finish online, because her anxiety was so bad that she couldn't make herself go to school. Then, being home all day with online school, she became so depressed that she didn't want to live, and I was afraid to leave her alone for fear she would harm herself. This situation is extremely difficult for her.

I'm more afraid of what will happen to her mental health and mine too than I am of the virus, to be honest.
2CC

[BenFranklin]

It's challenging but trying to focus on the positive aspect of keeping my daughter away from former friends that lead her into some of her troubles. I'm fortunate that I can take some time off work and stay home with my kids and maybe help her to learn new habits. Keeping busy around the house, praising her when she's doing something helpful for her self and our family. Maybe tomorrow we'll re-grout the master bath.
Still more phone use than I'd like, but maybe that's a better form of contact than hanging out physically w/friends.
As above, I'm more concerned with her mental health than this virus. While she's only been home for a few days, we've had no melt downs and are not yet 'walking on eggshells. For this I'm thankful and maybe a little more hopeful.