(Com)promise more?

[journey2020]

My bf has the classic signs of BPD with his fear of abandonment. It was during one intense storm years back that had driven me to find this helpful website.

We have been together for eight years with two "recycles". I live part time with my father and part time with my bf. We compromised on this part time arrangement and he tried to tolerate the loneliness when I am not around. It all imploded recently with no sign when I ran an errand for my father on bf day. My bf declared an end to our rs with more resolve than before.

I am not sure if I am ready to leave him or he is ready to leave me. I feel heartbroken about leaving the love behind yet I feel like leaving him as I know he is trying hard to tolerate the loneliness. Should I promise more time for him? I cannot promise all the time for him so it may never be enough after all.

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[juju2]

Hi journey

You are in a tough spot.

You have a lot of time invested.

You have found this website, this community that cares.

  I don't know a lot about what to do.
Maybe give yourself some time.  Maybe your bf has had a chance to calm.
Things look better tomorrow.

give yourself some peaceful quiet calm moments, see what comes to you.

For me, if I can get some quiet moments, enjoy beauty in nature, give myself some nurturing.  Sometimes things can look different, so as for me to find a way.

Be good to yourself.
amback

[journey2020]

I stop seeing him for a week. He did not contact me unlike the last outburst. I suspect this is because recently he started seeing another girl who already has a bf. I keep thinking about the past: the wonderful times and the red flags. Why would I want to keep walking on eggshells?

[Naughty Nibbler]

I keep thinking about the past: the wonderful times and the red flags. Why would I want to keep walking on eggshells?

  An emotionally healthy person wouldn't want to keep walking on eggshells?

[once removed]

hi Journey2020, and

We have been together for eight years with two "recycles"

tell us more about these recycles. if things have previously led to a split between the two of you before, it may shed some light on whats going on now.