I’ve been in a relationship for about 3 years now my partner started off with small lies then started cheating and ended up being admitted into pine rest due to her spiraling outta control and feeling worthless etc she has recently been diagnosed with BPD and is in the process of starting therapy with a psychiatrist I love her but cant handle the infedelity I just recently made her leave our house and blocked her from contacting me idk if that’s the right thing to do or not but I am starting to develop anxiety and depression myself because of her actions
Hello my friend...
Ouf... that is really a tough one. Hope you are understanding that this really has nothing to do with you - except that you are on the receiving end of it.
Tell me. Are you in counselling for the anxiety and depression? It might not be a bad thing because BPD relationships can have a way of getting under your skin in a way that is very different.
So guess what? Because pwBPD are caught in what I will call "feelings based facts" which essentially means that they can swing to the point that they are not so grounded, it means that you are basically free to set your own boundaries as you see fit, based on your own understanding of what you want. Normally, this would sound very selfish. But until she gets deeper into her work, and it may be that you will need to wait a while, any agreement you make with her will not likely stick and the boundaries will begin to slide - which will cause your anxiety to rise - this is what is known as walking on eggshells, in case you haven't heard. It's normal to feel like this. Most people, including myself, have gone through that.
Have you read the book, Stop Walking on Eggshells? It's free on YouTube - it takes about 8 hours.
https://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=stop+walking+on+eggshells+book+youtube&&view=detail&mid=AEC27955A39F1E695CAEAEC27955A39F1E695CAE&&FORM=VRDGAR&ru=%2Fvideos%2Fsearch%3Fq%3Dstop%2520walking%2520on%2520eggshells%2520book%2520youtube%26qs%3Dn%26form%3DQBVR%26sp%3D-1%26pq%3Dstop%2520walking%2520on%2520eggshells%2520book%2520youtube%26sc%3D0-38%26sk%3D%26cvid%3D760AB0F3569A4ED49A0CB2D5820CFE17I hope this helps as a start.
Good luck. Hang in there.
Rev
