Hi - New to the Group I've gotten pretty desperate

[BeeMore]

Hi! Im new here and hoping to feel out the group and see if I can find some support here or not. I've gotten pretty desperate in recent months and have never felt so isolated in my life. We've been together 3 years and quarantine has really hurt our progress.

My partner has never been diagnosed with BPD however, he is a classic case. We both have mental health field experience and have sort of come to accept this as fact. He responds very poorly to criticism, experiences extreme surges of emotion very quickly, can be manipulative and hurtful, especially when he feels he is being abandoned, and so on.

Though we previously had been spending 4 or more nights a week together, this quarantine caused us to quickly move in together. And working from home, we are side by side all day, every day. Needless to say, our fighting has become tenfold. We typically have one big blow up every month or two - sobbing, hysterics, hurt feelings all around, threats to leave, and ultimately a resolution that typically gets me nowhere. We fight hard but make up quickly. This has become a weekly occurrence in quarantine and I just can't take it anymore. I feel like no amount of walking on eggshells to prevent the explosive emotions can help it anymore.

As I type, things with us are calm and manageable and loving. But they always seem that way before the spiral begins again.

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Melissinde]

Hi! I identify a lot with what you describe.. I've been living with my pwBPD for 8 months and at his best he has a crisis every 10 days... but sometimes more. It just feels impossible never to say at some point something that is going to trigger him into a crisis and when he enters his crisis mode, it's just impossible to resolve conflicts because of how overcome by his emotions he is... the rest of the time he is the opposite, a caring, gentle person and a good listener.. but for how long until the next episode?
This unstability is emotionally exhausting to me so.. I can imagine what you are going through. :/