after 20 year marriage

[BDR]

Wife of 20 years has a history of binging eating disorder (rehab 7 years into marriage ) bout of depression , bouts of spending , bouts of fitnessetc.. She had an affair a couple years ago began to focus all  her time and energy on her appearance and her body.  She was never able to discontinue the affair and when she did or tried to she started to seek out other younger man some 15 to 20 years younger. My 2 teenage daughters finally found out when they hacked into one of her accounts finding x rated pixs and messages to a guy just a few years older than my oldest daughter.

She would deny everything  and blast me for the accusation . I eventually started to track her movements and used recording devices because I thought it was going crazy. thats when I found out she was having random hookups with younger men - none who could support her( she was a stay at home mom for most of marriage). Even when I would catch her she would make up the biggest lies without any effort and many times would blow up on me and  make me feel like I was the crazy one .

She is now in a treatment center we have been separated about one month.  I do not see any way this marriage will last . I also have huge financial debt from her hidden  spending and hiding credit cards . Has anyone else ever experienced this type of behavior- she does have a beautiful charm and a loving side but looking back I realize there really was never any true intimacy in the marriage I was basically a caregiver and caretaker for her because  I felt sorry for her. I left out much more about crazy behavior and her ability to shred me to pieces in the early years - no longer works. My question is can anyone identify with this type of behavior?