Just wondering

[moon flair]

My daughter was diagnosed with BPD about 6 years ago.  She recently was hospitalized for 31 days and then went to a treatment facility for 3.5 months.  She took a downward turn after college graduation when all her friends were able to move on towards adulthood and she just couldn't. 
As parents we are just so worried she will never be able to have a successful, content life. 
Does anyone have a positive story they can share of a child that struggled for years but was able to pull it together?
She has been self harming severely for 7 years and has scars over 80% of her body.  She is developmentally about 9 although chronologically about to turn 24. 
I'm just so sad for my child and the future she may never have.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Huat]

Hello Clara Catherine and welcome.

Glad you found this forum...sorry you had need to.

Your question..."Does anyone have a positive story they can share of a child that struggled for years but was able to pull it together"...shows the same need that all of us have...hope/affirmation that our situations can change for the better. 

While my story is not your story, we do share the common denominator of sharing a relationship with a troubled child.  For sure there are others here who relate more.  Hopefully soon your post will bring replies from them.

Needless to say, this journey has been a difficult one for you and your family...your daughter.  It brings tears to my eyes to read she has scars over 80% of her body.

Since coming out of the treatment facility has there been any follow-up for her?  As parents, have you had the opportunity to go to counselling so to find ways to better deal with her behaviours?

You have all of that to handle and then comes along this world-wide pandemic that just adds to the stress you already had!   Enough already, right?

Hope you keep coming back to share, Clara Catherine.  In reality there are no quick fixes but I hope you find, as I have, that by putting fingers on the keyboard and pouring out your heart and your hurts, comes some relief.  In the years I have been participating in this forum, reading so many posts, I know your story is not unique.  You are not alone in your troubles.

Huat

[wendydarling]

Hello Clara Catherine   

I join Huat in welcoming you to our community. I understand your worry and so sad to read what you are going through with your DD, parents here relate, you are not alone. 

My DD struggled for years, hit crisis at 26 and was diagnosed (2015), and is now managing very well day to day. DD is not living independently yet, though continues to move gradually in the right direction through continuing treatment and support, she's gaining confidence, building skills and resilience. And finding peace.

Can you explain what '9 yrs developmentally' means. Is that part of the diagnosis? I think what helped me is to understand the context of my DD's struggles as our children are unique. It's very complicated and certainly a challenge for us, it is doable and requires patience and resolve. Reading through the resources here and posts helped me do that, gradually overtime, taking a day at a time. And of course learning the skills how to communicate with our sensitive children who are often desperate to feel heard and understood.

As Huat asks is there follow up treatment ... how's your DD taken to the recent time in hospital and the facility?

Glad you found us CC.

WDx