New here

[sarafina]

Hi, I’m here to find and give support with bpd relationships. I’m in my 50s yet I can not shake off the triggers I experience when dealing with here. It’s frustrating because no one understand and I only hear, “well, she’s always very nice to me.” Looking forward to reading your posts (if I can figure out how to use this site.)! 

[beatricex]

hi sarafina,
I bet the people here will understand.  Welcome.  I hope you post more.

In my case, the BPD'd people in my life are my Mom and step daughter.  I believe they are both probably NPD'd too.  Jury's still out on that one, but a common thing that occurs with the narcissist (I think) is they can smooze people and are very selective who they target.  So you get a lot of gaslighting as a result.

Thus, the "your Mom is always nice to me" I often get.  grrrrrrrrrrr

It was very validating when my Mom's best friend for most of last decade contacted me on Facebook (this was about 10 years ago), after they had a falling out, to let me know she always thought I was a nice person and didn't understand why my Mom said such horrible things about me.  So.  Maybe if you wait awhile, the tides will change.   

b