Hey all. So this is the new update as of 2/19/21..
She called me yesterday. I was dealing with my friend who came to visit me who I was trying to help with some immigration law questions. (hence my name. Im a paralegal. Paralegals do briefs.. but Im in boxers.. stupid and corny Im sorry)...
I digress..
She calls me. says shes on sleeping pills and took many. (This was about 9:30 because I needed a shower and told her Id call her back after my shower). I sent her a message on facebook. Im stupid I unblocked her - but as I posted in a previous post. It was our wedding day.Im grieving still. Im stupid I dont learn but I got enough on my plate - I need to get into law school. Again.. I digress.. Im sorry..
So she still harps on my friends who called me because they werent doing well. One was with the Stage 4 Cancer (I told her she died - but she is alive and well thank God)
So the whole time (2 hours) shes saying how I texted people in front of her (these are the people who I mentioned prior) So I was like.. fine. I did this in front of you and behind your back. I texted my friends who needed me (to see if she would stop - She kept on going) She also got mad at me (mind you Im not with her) she got mad because my # was on facebook when I didnt know. I had to go back and fix it. Shes also "why is she calling you about personal things ?
Im like its a family, we help each other out. Shes like why personal stuff. Then shes like
"oh you should of turned your phone off. If your mother needed you, she could of called my phone" What is that? Is that controlling? She wanted to see everyone on my phone. I said "no" She has like 5 friends. With me. and my job. I have police dept people, lawyers, elected officials, and people I worked with and came across with in my life. Why would I have to show her everyone and everything in my phone.
I finally told her I needed to puke (almost never made it to the bathroom since my head was spinning with her going on for 2 hours, and my blood sugar / blood pressure)
I dont know anymore...The death of her mom is coming up next month. And my feelings for her after she yelled at me are like a shattered glass which is beyond repair.
I dont feel love for her but she said something today which killed me..
We use to spend time in the hotel room since her house was a disaster and 4 fur babies took over. She was like 'She loved our happy place - which was the hotel... What killed me more. What pissed me off was when we had like mini picnics and forms of candle lit dinners. She made me plates of sandwiches with potato chips. And a soda...
And that Blake Shelton and Gwen Stefani song..
"I been thinkin' about what I want in my life
It begins and ends the same
If I had to choose what I couldn't lose
There'd only be one thing"..
...
