False Memories, Drugs and betrayal

[LaPerla075]

I've going out with a guy with Bpd for nearly a year now he is 44 years old and Im 45. He has plenty of qualities and ever since I learned his mental condition I've tried to learn about his issues and help him (he refuses to take medication and therapy). We're more like friends than partners as he its very afraid to have a formal relationship because of his bad past experiences.

This December things started to get worse... one of his friends committed suicide and he started drinking heavily and using drugs. He started to push me away and been very controlling.

Last week, I went to his house without to tell him and I saw a lady on his bed and days later I also find out he also took the same lady to a date because she tagged him on Instagram. I felt so sad and overwhelmed at the time, however, for the love and respect I tried to believe him..

Everything was ok for a couple days... until I accidentally started to follow his "new friend" on Instagram. The lady profile was open and was no need for me to follow... I told him. It was an accident... However, things gone worse, he actually started to accuse things I haven't done... like to throw a box on his other friend when I saw the lady on his bed.
I was so afraid and I actually tried to doubt myself ?
Luckily, on the day I saw the lady in his bedroom, he sent me a picture of his friend o saying his friend was annoyed because I didn't see him in the bathroom. So, how could I throw a box on his friend if I wasn't aware he was there?

My boyfriend looks so angry like I never saw him before, he called me names, told me I was crazy and a liar and that he saw everything with his won eyes.. I was in tears, but not even for a moment I offended him back

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Cat Familiar]

Are you worried that he might get violent? It’s certainly frightening when they believe an entirely different reality.

[LaPerla075]

Are you worried that he might get violent? It’s certainly frightening when they believe an entirely different reality.

Well, he was verbaly violent last time I spoke to him and I told him I had to step back, because I was emotionaly drained. However,  when I send him messages he doesnt reply back, like he is giving me a silence treatment.
Now Im confused and I dont know what to do next.