Tips for helping a my spouse deal with her emotionsl upsets

[doghouse]

Hi,
My wife of 50 years has undiagnosed BPD.
I was only able to find the final piece of this puzzle after 45 years of emotional exhaustion and hours of therapy. I wanted to understand her severe mood swings and bouts of hostility toward me. We both grew up in dysfunctional families plagued with alcoholism so, based on the assumption that this was the source of our marital problems, we spent 30+ years attending Al-Anon meetings and working the 12-steps. This provided Intensive Care, but the purpose of IC is to keep patients alive until the correct treatment can be determined. So, we were able to avoid divorce and domestic violence. but the correct treatment could not be determined. The overlapping of symptoms with anxiety disorders, bi-polar disorders, and dyslexia [yes she has that too!] kept pointing in the wrong direction. Then in 2018, I was searching the web for solutions when I came across some sites talking about living with BPD afflicted persons. Although the sites were mostly rants about the frustrations of dating someone with BPD, they provided a core list of symptoms that led me to other sources for diagnosis and treatment.  This is one of them.

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[Cat Familiar]

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