Not sure what to believe

[ReskRising]

When we started to get more serious the fights started happening. It made no sense because they weren't really about anything. This has been going on for 2 years and we both feel crazy. I think she is gaslighting me and she says that I am the one doing it to her. She says I pick fights and says she doesn't know what I'm talking about when I tell her she's manipulative and a liar. Does this disorder make them completely oblivious to their behavior or is it all intentional? If they are unaware how is one to be compationate while not overlooking or
 rewarding bad behavior?

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Goose88]

I wonder the same exact things.

[once removed]

one person has to step up to end the conflict. you can learn more about how to do it here: https://bpdfamily.com/content/ending-conflict

welcome, friend. what are you and your loved one fighting about?