My mother

[Crumblekid]

It is 46 entyears since my mother killed herself. Her death has haunted my life. It's only recently that it's been suggested to me that she might have suffered with BPD. Reading up on the subject, I can see that the diagnosis fits like a glove.  Mood swings, explosive rages, depressions. To a greater or lesser extent she ticked all nine boxes.

What brought it on?  I've taken a deep dive into her early life and have come to the alarming concusion that she might well have been sexually abused as a child by her elder brother, a brother from whom she broke off all contact as an adult.

I have shared these thoughts with my sister.  She got really upset, now considers me crazy and has stopped answering my calls. Is her reaction a common one?

[pursuingJoy]

Crumblekid, glad you're here. I'm so sorry for what you've been through. 

I can only imagine how difficult it might be to read/hear that information about your mom potentially having BPD. Does it give you some insight into her thinking and motivation? How did your sister deal with your mother's death? Do you think she'll come around once she's had a chance to process the information?

[ILMBPDC]

I have shared these thoughts with my sister.  She got really upset, now considers me crazy and has stopped answering my calls. Is her reaction a common one?

I don't know your sister or how your conversation went but she may just be processing and dealing with the info. Just your blurb about her reaction and cutting off all ties though screams possible BPD to me (and in some cases it seems to run in families)  Not diagnosing based on one piece of info and I may be biased with all my BPD reading over the last few weeks but its something to consider.

[Crumblekid]

I don’t think she has BPD, but she certainly has a horror of going the way of my mother. That’s why she doesn’t even like talking about it. That said, today she did reply to an email, so things are on the mend

[pursuingJoy]

That said, today she did reply to an email, so things are on the mend

Glad to hear this. I think most of us fear becoming what has hurt us. I hope you and your sister can find support in each other as you process and navigate these ideas.