Underground Railroad for Escape?

[priscillapouts]

Hi, Family...

The BPD Family offered me assistance, personal asylum, and led me to escape my captor 20 years ago. I would not have made it out alive without the BPD veterans. We all know the limitless sorrows brought on by those with BPD. And because this disorder is so pervasive, I now witness two new generations of my family coming forward with the same myriad problems...and not knowing what to do. All I know to do is offer them what I received through this website, and I hope they can hear me.

I am still in contact with one of the many who helped me -- a BPD sister who assisted me and loved me through leaving my BPD: the many years of and letting go, and then learning how to really let it go. She and I have become more than blood relatives, though we still live many hundreds of miles apart. I just want to encourage all of you to keep this site going, keep coming back for support, take what you hear that makes good sense, then learn to trust in your gut & not your ghosts. There really is a life beyond BPD.

My question today is for the graduates: Anyone know of an "underground railway" for families with independent teenagers on the run from their abusive BPD parents ? NOT gov't agencies.

Thank you to all of  you.

Grateful Susie

[Notwendy]

I am glad you were helped but my response is with caution. Not working through government agencies is risky, both for the person helping and for the teen. Even abusive parents, if they are the legal guardians, doing something like this is illegal. And there could be "helpers" who are up to no good.

If there's a concern about abuse, the best step is to call child protective services. Even if the investigation doesn't show enough to them to warrant intervention, there's a record of it and if it happens again, they see repeated calls.

For many families, abuse is not so overt, and in addition, there could be an enabling parent who is mitigating the situation. Removing a child may not always be in their best interest.

Extended family can also mitigate abuse by having the child stay with them for times, and also provide love and other attention and be a role model.

If the child is already a runaway, I still think social services is the best and safest intervention. Just as it's possible for people to have good intentions when stepping in to help, there are people with intent to use and abuse the teen- possibly worse than their BPD parent. Government agencies may not always be perfect, but they avoid the risk of more harm.