I am new to realizing my daughter in law has BPD. The struggle for me has been hell for 15 years. Hopefully I can find a solution and learn how to live with her without so much conflict.
Hello DLK,
We are here to listen and support you.
I will point you to two books when I first learned about BPD that were instrumental in learning how to deal and live with my person with BPD, who is my wife.
The first one was to identify with reasonable certainty she is indeed a 'borderline' - "Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back When Someone You Care About Has Borderline Personality Disorder" by Paul T. T. Mason MS & Randi Kreger. Make sure you get the 3rd edition as it has a really useful assessment tool in it.
The 2nd one, is to manage the dynamic so it does not go out of control with yelling / rages / or even physical violence - "Stop Caretaking the Borderline Or Narcissist: How to End the Drama and Get on with Life" by Margalis Fjelstad
There are also many articles and workshops on this site as well to help you out.
If you tell us more, we can point you in a better direction.
Take care, with self-care.
SD
