Divorce Poison- Richard A. Warshak, PhD

[BPDFamily]

Divorce Poison: How to Protect Your Family from Bad-mouthing and Brainwashing Author: Richard A. Warshak, PhD. Publisher: William Morrow Paperbacks; Revised ed. edition (January 19, 2010) Paperback: 352 pages ISBN-10: 0061863262 ISBN-13: 978-0061863264

Book Description
Some level of animosity is typical in divorce, but when parents let those feelings degenerate into bad-mouthing, bashing, or brainwashing, they run the risk of emotionally damaging their children, according to child psychologist Warshak. He looks at the poisonous relationships that develop when parents carry criticism of their ex-spouses too far: parents and children estranged from one another, protracted and bitter custody and visitation battles, and even ruined relationships with the extended families. He uses case studies to illustrate how parents--sometimes unconsciously, sometimes deliberately--force children to choose between them and turn against the other parent. He describes a range of difficulties, from tainted parent-child relationships to an emotional disturbance known as parental alienation syndrome. Warshak offers strategies for parents to examine their motivations when they speak against a former spouse, to curb negative impulses, and to repair damage that may already have been done. Useful resource for families dealing with divorce and child rearing.
 
About the Author
Richard A. Warshak is a clinical, consulting, and research psychologist in private practice in Dallas, Texas with more than thirty years experience. He grew up in Brooklyn, N.Y. and earned his undergraduate degree from Cornell University. He received his Ph.D. in 1978 from U.T.’s Southwestern Medical Center where is now a Clinical Professor of Psychology. Dr. Warshak is past president of the Dallas Society for Psychoanalytic Psychology and he sits on the Editorial Board of three professional journals.
 
In 1977, at a time when few fathers were awarded child custody, Warshak collaborated with Professor John Santrock to conduct landmark studies comparing mother-custody and father-custody families. These studies established Dr. Warshak as the leading expert on father-custody. Because he was an early advocate of greater father involvement with children than was common in the late 70s, he was branded a fathers’ rights advocate. His subsequent work assisting divorced mothers and highlighting the dangers of joint custody with abusive fathers changed this perception.
 

[CharlyB]

This book was very helpful to my husband.

He is a long distance, non-custodial Dad and his ex can be very difficult.

My therapist recommended this book and I'm glad she did.

[ForeverDad]

I just got a copy of the 2010 revised Divorce Poison by Richard Warshak.  On the cover it states it has been updated with a new introdution and afterword.  I haven't determined whether the body of the book's text was updated, but it has an added chapter A NOTE TO THE READER and a chapter AFTERWORD.  Both are important reads.

The afterword mentions a program named Family Bridges - A Workshop for Troubled and Alienated Parent-Child Relationships.  It's a rather new service - and very successful - and he describes it in greater detail on his web site.  Essentially it is an intensive workshop usually in a vacation setting lasting several days that has lasting benefits for the children.

Overall, this inexpensive paperback is highly recommended and remains an important reference source for our members in their efforts to most effectively communicate with our children and deal with the other parents' efforts to sabotage our parenting.

[SamwizeGamgee]

This was a very sobering book to me.  I read it years ago, sensing things were getting bad long before they did.  Now my D17 has fully rejected me.  I got a little hope from the book though, that as I try to keep being present, some kids can come back to normal relationships.