It was my first relationship and I thought the way she acted was at time very weird but eventually grew accustomed to it and started to think maybe I was the mentally ill one... .
I understand what you are describing alex44103 and I'm sorry. I also felt like I was losing my mind with my ex's dysfunctional behaviors and I was ignoring her red flags - dissociating. My intuition took a back seat. I thought that I was the crazy one. It's called
FOG (Fear Obligation Guilt) and from your story she throws up a lot of FOG.
Also the day she went on the date with the other man she was texting me acting as if we would be together forever then left me the next day saying I never tried hard enough and didn't get to know her parents enough when she used to make them out to be unloving and cruel.
It hurts alex44103 and these r/s are difficult. I'm sorry. She found another attachment and
Projected her negative behaviors and emotions on you to absolve her inappropriate actions.