BPD ex being cold and don't know how to react correctly

[Miner22]

My quiet ex bpdgf dated for around 5 months and there were 2 breakups and  reconciliations. About a month ago we agreed to be casual and take some time to work on our own issues, i.e. her BPD of course and my anxiety issues (which i think is a great initiative).

However over the last month she has progressively become more cold towards me and to the point where she simply won't reply to my messages, show a lack of interest when talking to me and never initiates any activities or conversations. It evolved into a heated discussion where she said "we shouldn't hang out as much since we are friends", and after 1-2 weeks of pure cold contact from her I got so frustrated and I said "i didn't want to waste any more energy" as a reply and said I wouldn't get in her way.

Right now I'm 4 days no contact and we bumped into each other today by accident and we just froze up and walked away instantly. Part of me wants to tell her how much I love her, miss her and show how weak I am for her which i always did in the past. What I'm doing now is NC and I'm certain she's shocked as she knows I've never done this before and she didn't think I would be able to last this long without contacting her.

Now the question i want to ask is what school of thought should i enact here and in future when a bpd ex/gf is being cold, distant and pushing you away?

1. Maintaining no contact: gives her time and space to revalue me and pull me back in, and contacting her would only make her push me further away?

2. Send an occasional message every couple days to show her I'm still thinking about her and hoping she's okay which can facilitate the split to "white"?

Besides this, any advice as how to interact with a bpd loved one when they are splitting you, devaluing you and pushing you is appreciated.

Also is there a time-frame for when they come back or is it just entirely situational?

Thank you everyone.

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