Hello everybody!
Just wanted to update my story for anyone interested who has been reading it or for anyone who has not a clue what has happened to me but wants to be the extent of the things borderline can do. Its a long post i hope you dont fall asleep while reading it
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So, last week, more things happened that made me stay NC. Im NC at the moment for 4 days in a row (my new record!).
So here it goes: Last Thursday i was NC for some days. And i was having the urge to contact her and say something. I wanted to know how she was and try to get from her the truth again about the latest betrayal (I have a phone call that my replacement gave me where she talks to him about it. She says she trusted this guy, had unprotected sex with him, and that now she fears she might have a STD as she developed an infection and that now, after she knew he had been having an affair with his male neighbour who could be infected with some nasty disease, she dumped him). So, i sent her a message asking how she was from her medical problems (she also developed a cutaneous infection on her breast but that was not related to this and also asked her about it). We talked a bit, she said she wasn't yet alright, feared she might have breast cancer (she always fears cancer... .First was cutaneous cancer, later from some abdominal organ, then brain cancer, now its breast cancer), i told her i hoped she would be ok and to stay calm and said goodbye.
Then, later that day, my replacement that left her when he discovered she was my girlfriend and betrayed both of us with the third guy told me she was again into online chatting. So, i arranged with him to go to this chat. I went there, played a bit around, was having some real fun and she seemed interested in me (i could hear them both on vídeo call on MSN as my replacement had it on and was on a call on Skype with me, so i could hear her). I was flirting with her and my replacement (he went as a girl, so i was supposed to not know it). First i seemed to go after my exBPDgf's bait and started flirting with her. Later on i faked to have lost interest and become interested in her friend (the replacement). She got annoyed and even said (This ass) between her teeth as she felt I left her behind for another girl, i guess. Then, she started posting musics she posted when she said she would break up with me and my replacement (James Arthur, Impossible and Recovery and Skyscraper from Demi Lovato). When she was trying to get my attention she even sent a music she sent me when she was courting with me at the beginning of our relationship!
Damn, i was annoyed and petrified. We kept fooling around and later on she sends a private message to me. Says hello, starts talking with me, some normal chat, then she talks about me being of a certain área of the country, i ask how she knew it and she says her EX was from there and that she had broken up with him (altough we kept some contact, we had broken up 2 weeks ago). I start exploring it, she talks about the time we spent together, that she really enjoyed it and that i was a great guy, altough she said i tought about the future and planned too much (
, i dont live just in the now and here like her... .). She says we didnt work out and that she broke up with me (Lol, it was me who broke up with her because of the cheating and lies). Dunno how, i ended up talking about cheating and if she had done it during this period (she says she never cheated on me... .Such a damn liar!). She says she was always faithful but i was obsessed about her having someone else (LOL!). Then she asks if im single out of nowhere. I made up i had a girlfriend to break her interest up. She asks if everything is fine between us, i guess to check if there was any breach in the Wall (i make up a solid relationship). We talked more and i started asking personal questions about her. I asked if she works and she says she works and studies at same time and lives alone (Like she said to me, before she confessed much later on, when i deeply loved her that she had a husband and he supported her financially and they were still living together). Later on she ends talking about him, how it didnt work and they separated (she is still married and lives with him) and that they have a child but he helps with him (yeah, a lot, she thinks too much about herself and he has a lot of work at home by making her the dinner every night, give the kid a bath, play with him, when a lot of the time she is on her dramas, on facebook or the computer. She even accused me of stealing time she could be with her son and now i know she maintained 2 relationships at same time, i guess she wasnt short of time then... .).
We kept talking and in a certain part she says to my replacement through skype that she thinks its me, her EX. I tell my replacement to try to say she is obessed with me or something to keep me low profile. She tries to unmask me but is unsucessful. I talk about some more stuff and im able to clear up her doubts and she stops thinking its me. We talk a bit and say goodbye to each other.
We were shocked about all the lies and stuff she said. The way her view of things was distorted and such and my replacement was shocked also because this was his proof that she kept being with me until the end (she said to him she had something with me this year for only a couple of months and that she left me and we were just friends until now... .). We even saw the same hooking pattern she used on us (we both were long distance relationships and i was the one who got to live near her first).
Next morning i woke up and i had a lot of messages from her on viber with her saying she talked to a friend (was a stranger, and me masked xD) and realized how important i am to her, how she had a problem with men, by depending too much emotionally on them (not talking about betrayals), how she was going to a psychologist to try to solve that, that she missed me and i was an important part of her life. I asked her for the thruth, that i had all the evidence she was with this 3rd guy and that i couldnt close my eyes anymore to the fact that she had my replacement so close all this time. She said she had told me all the thruth (I guess the taped call was someone with a similar voice then, lool) and that she only was with my replacement a few times (yeah, he showed me his viber history, i guess she forgot to multiply it by 10). I said no! I cant be friends or boyfriend of someone who lies systematically to me, says her problem has nothing to do with betrayal, that she was never unfaithful before (yeah, right) and toys me and my replacement in such a way!
She painted me totally black. That i didnt forgive her, didnt know how to be fair, was losing a great oportunity to start everything back from the start, that she told me all the truth and i was being paranoic by not seeing it... .I just waited her to finish and said goodbye and that i hoped one day she became better of her problem and a happy person and that i only wished her good.
Now im on 4th day NC. She posted a lot of things on her blog to me. About how this was the end, the good moments we spent together and how she would grieve me in the next 3 weeks now that she went to spend with her son and husband in the camping and then on the beach.
Im doing fine right now. After all this, i couldnt want anything else with her anymore. I was still thinking she could do some therapy and improve and become better now that she admited she had a problem. But she doesnt see the problem as i do and i guess she will make me the bad guy on therapy and try to get some validation. Eventually she will get a new victim and the cycle restarts... .
I was really deep down the rabbit hole... .
