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Author Topic: Stbx uBPDw b-day next week  (Read 484 times)
gomez_addams
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Almost divorced
Posts: 284
« on: June 02, 2015, 04:27:45 PM »
So how do I handle the stbx uBPDw's birthday next week?

I was pretty much planning to ignore it, but that would be an enormous trigger.

I thought about some flowers, but that shows inconsistency.

I am past the point of trying to be reasonable. I only want to do what is efficient. I don't mind grabbing some flowers (heh... .Out the joint account, naturally). Would this be horrible in light of me trying to press the D-Train forward?

Seeing my L on Thursday to pay the retainer and get the ball rolling.

Seeing my T tmw to get a mental/emotional boost.

Thoughts?

Gomez
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Mike-X
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: living apart
Posts: 669
« Reply #1 on: June 02, 2015, 04:38:45 PM »
Can you elaborate a little on your situation: are you still living together? kids? current contact? does she know you are seeing a lawyer? does she want the divorce?

Quote from: gomez_addams on June 02, 2015, 04:27:45 PM
So how do I handle the stbx uBPDw's birthday next week?

I was pretty much planning to ignore it, but that would be an enormous trigger.

I thought about some flowers, but that shows inconsistency.

I am past the point of trying to be reasonable. I only want to do what is efficient. I don't mind grabbing some flowers (heh... .Out the joint account, naturally). Would this be horrible in light of me trying to press the D-Train forward?

Seeing my L on Thursday to pay the retainer and get the ball rolling.

Seeing my T tmw to get a mental/emotional boost.

Thoughts?

Gomez
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GaGrl
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner’s ex
Posts: 5730
« Reply #2 on: June 02, 2015, 06:34:41 PM »
What about something rather innocuous, like a non-sentimental card with a gift card inside?  Definitely no flowers, no dinner out, no celebration.
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"...what's past is prologue; what to come,
In yours and my discharge."
gomez_addams
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Almost divorced
Posts: 284
« Reply #3 on: June 02, 2015, 07:03:27 PM »
No kids. She knows I want a divorce. She claims to be packing her stuff to head to her home state. I'm in a rented room temporarily.

Non-descript card seems doable. I agree -- no flowers, dinner, etc... .

I'll ask my T tomorrow as well.

Gomez
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Panda39
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner’s ex
Relationship status: SO and I have been together 9 years and have just moved in together this summer.
Posts: 3462
« Reply #4 on: June 02, 2015, 09:08:05 PM »
Why do you feel obligated to get her anything? 
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"Have you ever looked fear in the face and just said, I just don't care" -Pink
gomez_addams
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Almost divorced
Posts: 284
« Reply #5 on: June 02, 2015, 09:26:06 PM »
Quote from: Panda39 on June 02, 2015, 09:08:05 PM
Why do you feel obligated to get her anything? 

F.O.G.

I embody it.

Gomez
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Panda39
********
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner’s ex
Relationship status: SO and I have been together 9 years and have just moved in together this summer.
Posts: 3462
« Reply #6 on: June 02, 2015, 09:32:12 PM »
Quote from: gomez_addams on June 02, 2015, 09:26:06 PM
Quote from: Panda39 on June 02, 2015, 09:08:05 PM
Why do you feel obligated to get her anything? 

F.O.G.

I embody it.

Gomez

Smiling (click to insert in post) Laugh out loud (click to insert in post) Yep, there you go  Doing the right thing (click to insert in post)
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"Have you ever looked fear in the face and just said, I just don't care" -Pink
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