Well, I was married for ten years... . we married twice. She was diagnosed BPD after our son turned three. I have custodial rights to my son and that is going well and I have healed from that rs... . I believe.
To today, I have recently had a ten month RS with a woman who lived 3 hours away. She moved to my town, which is, our hometown... . we grew up together. I am not sure she has BPD but I think that she might... . I had r
from day one. I will try to articulate them and see what you think. I am still somewhat struggling and this is my first communication with people that will understand.
1. Married 3 times between 25 and 37.
2. Molested when she was 6
3. Parents split when she was 9 and she lived with her dad and became his emotional support.
4. Her mother is hyper-critical of her and they have a bond that is not parental-daughter.
5. She is a drug addict.
Our relationship
1.Pushed through boundaries on our first date. Showed up at my house in the morning and did not respect that my son was there... . this was my fault because I allowed it.
2. She controlled sex on that first day... . came over at night after drinking and said she wanted some more soft kisses and the next thing I know she is taking off my pants.
3. She said that she adored me and that is different than just love.
4. Continuously obsessed and texted/called me... . if I was at the gym for an hour she would ask if I was ok.
5. Still talked to ex's.
6. Vacillated between marriage and saying she was bitter and may never want to marry.
7. Chipped at the pedestal continuously.
8. Wanted to know and be a part of everything I was.
9. Shifted to needing me to do everything for her.
10. Became paranoid that ex"s were going to contact me.
11. Pancreatitis twice due to taking codeine 3... . the second time it was so nonchalant like she knew she would be off work, in the hospital for a week and then receive her drip.
12. Became increasingly aggressive and I started to remove my son.
13. Stated that she is overwhelmed and doesn't have time for a relationship with me.
14. She had a look of joy as she handed me my things and smacked me on the butt and said "it will be ok."
15. I was a wreck... . we texted for two months and called a few times and saw her once. She was in the hospital and sick for most of that time.
This week, I texted and said we should get some tea and she said sounds like a plan and another nice text in the evening that Thurs. should work. The problem is that her three daughters are out of town and I know that she has had a guy staying there all week. I asked her if she is seeing someone and she said that there is a man who has been very helpful during this difficult time but that they are just friends. I got a little defensive and she said that she is sorry that I am hurting and that things didn't work out... . very cold. There is so much more to the story but I am too exhausted... . any thoughts would be great. Yes, I have some things to work on!
