i want my dignity back.
Did she take it? Did she steal it?
I think by saying wanting to have ur dignity back, you already got it back no? A r/s with a pwBPD only highlights your weaknesses, it's not clever enough to take your dignity. You might have given it to her, but she had no idea, that's what I believe
no, of course technically and literally she did not steal it. but in a sense, yes she did. i knew nothing about cluster b or disordered people when i met her. (ok, YES there were some red flags but i had NO IDEA the severity of what they signified or what layed ahead for me if i stayed).
pwBPD, with their
Intermittent Reinforcement, it gets us hooked. it's basically abuse.
we were emotionally abused. emotional abuse victims. in that sense, yes, she mind fvcked me up one side and down the other before i even knew what hit me, so yeah in that sense she stole my dignity.
do i expect her to give it back? no, of course not. she doesn't have it! (but even if she did, she wouldn't give it back,
! pwBPD keep everything, like some kind of hoarding, object constancy or something). trying to get my stuff back was a nightmare. h*ll i couldn't even get her to let me give
her stuff back to her ~ had to leave it on her porch. ostrich in the sand, the BPD version of Avoid Avoid and don't forget to Deny while you're at it)... . i'm the only one that can get my dignity back. workin' on it.
OTOH, using wiki definition, all of us may have lost our dignity (see bolded below) as i believe we did NOT receive ethical treatment from our ex's, and that we were vulnerable people, and that we were not rcv'ing the proper degree of respect - even by ourselves. but perhaps i'm just mincing words?
www.en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dignity
Dignity is a term used in moral, ethical, legal, and political discussions to signify that a being has an innate right to be valued and receive ethical treatment. It is an extension of the Enlightenment-era concepts of inherent, inalienable rights. Dignity is often used in proscriptive and cautionary ways: for example in politics it is usually used to critique the treatment of oppressed and vulnerable groups and peoples, but it has also been extended to apply to cultures and sub-cultures, religious beliefs and ideals, animals used for food or research, and plants. Dignity also has descriptive meanings pertaining to human worth, although there is no exact or agreed upon definition of this worth. In general, the term has various functions and meanings depending on how the term is used and on the context.
The English word "dignity" comes from Latin dignitas by way of French dignité.[1] In ordinary usage it denotes respect and status, and it is often used to suggest that someone is not receiving a proper degree of respect, or even that they are failing to treat themselves with proper self-respect.
