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Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits. Practicing lawyer, Senior Family Mediator, and former Licensed Clinical Social Worker with twelve years’ experience and an expert on navigating the Family Court process.
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Author Topic: a tragic train of events and a warning  (Read 495 times)
Calm Waters
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Relationship status: married living together
Posts: 219



« on: April 02, 2014, 04:58:56 AM »

more detail on my other threads however this is the scenario:

BPD suicidal mother NPD distant father

My first depression episode at 17

Left family to get away from madness at 20

built a successful life, married, carrer, home children throgh 1980's and 90's

Best friend married to my wifes sister - they had an acrimonious divorce during early 2000's that divided the family loyalties

Been in and out  of therapy and couples therapy for 25 years

I due tio stress started acting out, my dormant BPD came out, started risky sexual encounters

My older son at 17 due to drugs and poor choices goes off the rails, this activates my childhood BPD issues still further

in 2012 after 10 years of costant stress i plan to leave my family, i walk out one day and leave 3 notes, wife and 2 sons

couch surf for 3 months

meet and fall in love with what turns out to be a seriously BPD women who I had known a little over 20 years

She declares I am the one and asks me to move in with her, i slowly do

My wife and kids in crisis, me in denial seriously off on a BPD trip but madly in love with new women

late 2012 older son now suicidal, brother with cancer, sister in law with cancer, wife in crisis, new girlfriend getting impatient

I leave girlfriend as she is blaming me for everything and cant seem to understand what I am dealing with

girlfriend attempts and nearly succeeds in suicide attempt, seh recovers with my help then finds a replacement and dumps me - revenge on her part

I learn all about BPD as I am off work with stress for 4 months back at home reconciling with wife, but not sleeping for months with out sleeping tablets

I slowly recover from post traumatic stress ( suicide attempt and my own trauma) and try MELATONIN to aid sleep

My Mum dies due to giving up and stopping eating - she finally commits suicide at 88 yo and has severe rheumatoid arthritis

Melatonin has now it seems triggered my rheumatoid arthritis! I am in a lot of physical pain and undergoing tests

BE WARNED BPD and MELATONIN are bad for your health!

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heartandwhole
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 3592



« Reply #1 on: April 02, 2014, 09:59:24 AM »

Calm Waters,

This is terrible, my heart goes out to you.  You have been through so much.  I'm glad you are having tests to help with the physical symptoms.

How are you coping with the emotional toll?   Are you, and the family, in therapy again?

Keep posting, we're here for you. 

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When the pain of love increases your joy, roses and lilies fill the garden of your soul.
momtara
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 2636


« Reply #2 on: April 02, 2014, 10:15:32 AM »

Sorry to hear you have been through so much.  I think it's good that you are acknowledging having BPD.  Hope you can stay in counseling so that things can calm down a little.  Your last sentence blamed the melatonin, but seems like BPD is the bigger issue and you have to try to focus on getting better.  Good luck!
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nolisan
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Posts: 332



« Reply #3 on: April 04, 2014, 03:09:51 AM »

That's a tough road.

What have you leaned other than not to combine BPD with Melatonin?

You are still alive! Please tell us why and how.
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Calm Waters
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Relationship status: married living together
Posts: 219



« Reply #4 on: April 04, 2014, 06:34:02 AM »

there is quite a lot of anecdotal evidence that melatonin can trigger underlying auto immune conditions like rheumatoid arthritis. The link for me is that the BPD issues I mention caused me too try melatonin to get more sleep after the trauma associatied with BPd
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