What is the most heartless thing your ex-BPD did to you?

[notdownyet]

This is a tricky question to answer, as like most people here, I've got so many to choose from.

(this isn't from an ex, but from my current wife)

Last Christmas, my wife was having an extreme episode, which appeared to have psychotic features mixed with mania.

At the time, she was blaming me for everything going wrong in her life, and had recently had an affair exposed.  In short, she was out of touch with reality, and was being unimaginably cruel and sadistic towards me.

During a heated argument, she told me that she wanted my parents do die, and then proceeded to ring them (both in their late 70's) on her mobile/cell phone, to tell them unpleasant things that I'd said about them (taken out of context), in the hope that it would induce a heart attack in one of them, as she phrased it.

As the phone was ringing, she waved the phone around in front of my face, taunting me and laughing at me.  

When my father answered I managed to get the phone off her, explaining that she was having an episode, and not to take her seriously.  I felt I had to be honest to some degree, in case it happened again.

[ogopogodude]

This is a tricky question to answer, as like most people here, I've got so many to choose from.

(this isn't from an ex, but from my current wife)

Last Christmas, my wife was having an extreme episode, which appeared to have psychotic features mixed with mania.

At the time, she was blaming me for everything going wrong in her life, and had recently had an affair exposed.  In short, she was out of touch with reality, and was being unimaginably cruel and sadistic towards me.

During a heated argument, she told me that she wanted my parents do die, and then proceeded to ring them (both in their late 70's) on her mobile/cell phone, to tell them unpleasant things that I'd said about them (taken out of context), in the hope that it would induce a heart attack in one of them, as she phrased it.

As the phone was ringing, she waved the phone around in front of my face, taunting me and laughing at me.  

When my father answered I managed to get the phone off her, explaining that she was having an episode, and not to take her seriously.  I felt I had to be honest to some degree, in case it happened again.

   My ex used to do that ALL the time, ... .that is, to go to the phone and start dialling someone, usually 911 and she would start to press the buttons and then throw the phone at me to catch it.  See soon realized that the police must come to the residence to investigate.  The next rage she would dial the nine, ... then the one, ... .then press the final # (one) without releasing it, ... then hanging up.  But the police would still come to the house to investigate.  Boy my ex spouse was just plain stupid.  Just  dumb.

   I realize now the whole point of her dialling 911 was to get attention and the sense of power. It was after two or three of these incidences that when I was at work, I made an appointment to go to the police station to discuss the "strange behaviour of my wife" and if there was anymore nutty incoming phone calls that it was my wife being an idiot.  I believe that they called her and told her that they would charge her with mischief if she abuses the 911 emergency line.  She didn't do this anymore after about four or five 911 calls, and I believe it was because of me meeting in person a higher up ranking police officer during a time of peace and calm. This sure helped for any future nuttiness as my wife was then "labelled" as a s____ disturber.

[Trog]

Wow, reading through these statements it's no wonder we are all so hurt, confused and seeking a relief from the mental anguish. There are many common themes here, carrying on an attack even when you are desperate and crying, isolating from family, hurting animals or children, these are all 100% unacceptable. Everyone of us deserves better than this. These people are just not worthy of the love and commitment we gave to them an it is sad that we gave it but now it's our work to overcome it and find peace, if not, they are still hurting us and I don't know about you guys, but I'm done and will be embracing life, friends and family in 2015 without my exBPDw, thank god for helping me escape her. Happy 2015 everyone.

[Painterly2014]

ClydeGriffith - That is horrible beyond belief.  I am so sorry 

Whitebread - My heart goes out to you .  When you needed him most he was being a jerk.  I have to say though that I would really enjoy seeing my BPDxh tased a few times  .  It would really make me feel better if I could do the tasing haha

[ADecadeLost]

To be honest, so much of it is a blur at this point that I'm not sure I could pick out a singular event.  A few of the other posters comments certainly ring true though.

Mostly the things my wife did were to isolate me from my family and some friends. She always said how my folks and my siblings hated her. She never let up. I started believing the awful things she said about my folks/family were true.

I had to constantly make excuses why she wasn't attending family functions. Telling friends why she wasn't there. That was horrible.

cehlers - You described the last decade of my life to a T.  It's sad that I was willing to let it happen the way it did, but I did.  Plenty of time to make it up to folks though, and I intend to (call it a New Years resolution).

[Indyan]

Wow, reading through these statements it's no wonder we are all so hurt, confused and seeking a relief from the mental anguish. There are many common themes here, carrying on an attack even when you are desperate and crying, isolating from family, hurting animals or children, these are all 100% unacceptable. Everyone of us deserves better than this. These people are just not worthy of the love and commitment we gave to them an it is sad that we gave it but now it's our work to overcome it and find peace, if not, they are still hurting us and I don't know about you guys, but I'm done and will be embracing life, friends and family in 2015 without my exBPDw, thank god for helping me escape her. Happy 2015 everyone.

Amen.

And happy 2015 to you too 

[hurting300]

My ex was only hateful to my mom once. No girlfriend will ever disrespect my mom. I told her I'd whip her ___ . That was childish and very stupid of me. I could have just said leave.