I am married, but not because I want to be married

[earlgrey]

morning Moselle, we must be on similar time zones... .our pals across the pond are probably still snoozing.

Thanks again for your insight. It is extrememly valuable, and reassuring (that my thinking is not too awry)

I have started a new thread 'what are the chances ?' and I think you have more or less answered that one too.

[Moselle]

Yes. I'm in South Africa,  so similar time zones.

My heart goes out to you. This is so difficult. I was there. I wanted to save mine and i hoped she would opt for recovery,  but her aggression and violence made it impossible. She opted out after 3 years of therapy.

Whatever your decision. I wish you all the best

[earlgrey]

3 years yikes!

yeah! I do not want to launch myself up blind alleys at my grand old age 

Say Hi to SA... .used to spend time in Rustenberg 

[Method]

earlgrey,

I am curious how your r/s is turning out. This sounds exactly where my r/s stands as of right now.

Thanks.

[earlgrey]

Hi Method... .it is all very disturbing.

My story (now) goes like this. If I put no pressure on r/s, make no comments, I live with a pwB/NPD traits 24/7, and i cannot stand it any more. Boundaries make it easier.

I make a comments about behaviour (in a nice way) I get denial and blame.

BTW I have been working at improving our dynamic for 5 yrs.

So I have ended up heading towards divorce.

Mention of divorce... .'oh we can make this work'  very superficial adjustments. Nothing major.

But the 'positive' we can make this work fools me - or used to. I am pushing through for divorce despite the 'we can make this work' song.

Been around this loop too long, need to get out.

[once removed]

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