I've tried for way too long

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

For years I've always thought it'll get better, maybe it's me, if I follow his lead he'll stop the temper tantrum, and maybe I have to stop enabling him. Even if I agree to move again because you don't like the neighbors, or leave the state because you now hate the state you insisted we move to, if we just do this one more thing you say you'll change. But no you can't change. You're incapable of it. The more I give in, the more it gets worse, no matter what I do for even that one day of normalcy there are many more that are making my life more and more difficult. I'm here to read and learn and maybe get the energy to do something for myself. This is all I'll say by way of introduction for now, but I'm sure more to come.

[Tijuca123]

For years I've always thought it'll get better, maybe it's me, if I follow his lead he'll stop the temper tantrum, and maybe I have to stop enabling him. Even if I agree to move again because you don't like the neighbors, or leave the state because you now hate the state you insisted we move to, if we just do this one more thing you say you'll change. But no you can't change. You're incapable of it. The more I give in, the more it gets worse, no matter what I do for even that one day of normalcy there are many more that are making my life more and more difficult. I'm here to read and learn and maybe get the energy to do something for myself. This is all I'll say by way of introduction for now, but I'm sure more to come.

[vortex of confusion]

 

Welcome to the forums!

How long have you been together?

I am coming out of an 18 year marriage (almost 20 years together). I recognize the pattern of "Things will get better when. . ."

These forums are a great place to figure stuff out and have people answer questions and sometimes ask helpful questions.