I want to know if walking away is best or if i should try and get her help

[t204]

Hi, I have spent 2 weeks browsing for answers. My now (recent ex gf) im trying to figure out. We are 40 and she has a young son. We were together for 5 years and it was flushed in seconds. I love her and care about her a lot none the less.
She would flip from being happy to irritated in seconds with any trigger.
I want to know if walking away is best or if i should try and get her help, I have mentioned it to her in the past and she told me shes fine i need counseling not her.

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Tattered Heart]

HI t204,

Welcome ,

I always think there is hope for a relationship with someone with BPD, but it takes a lot of work on your part in changing how you respond to her, looking at yourself and how you speak to her, and understanding your own boundaries. We have a lot of great lessons that can help on the right side of the page.

What led to the breakup? How long ago did you break up? Are you still speaking or in contact?

One of the hard parts about being in a relationship with someone with BPD is that they do not see their need for T. And any attempts on your part to get them to see a counselor can alienate them from you and make them see you as the enemy. My H thinks I'm treating him like a problem to be fixed when I try to get him to get help. He has to come to that conclusion on his own.

[t204]

Hi, Thanks for the response. I posted the situation. Hoping to get some sort of clarity.