Diagnosis + Treatment
The Big Picture
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde? [ Video ]
Five Dimensions of Human Personality
Think It's BPD but How Can I Know?
DSM Criteria for Personality Disorders
Treatment of BPD [ Video ]
Getting a Loved One Into Therapy
Top 50 Questions Members Ask
Home page
Forum
List of discussion groups
Making a first post
Find last post
Discussion group guidelines
Tips
Romantic relationship in or near breakup
Child (adult or adolescent) with BPD
Sibling or Parent with BPD
Boyfriend/Girlfriend with BPD
Partner or Spouse with BPD
Surviving a Failed Romantic Relationship
Tools
Wisemind
Ending conflict (3 minute lesson)
Listen with Empathy
Don't Be Invalidating
Setting boundaries
On-line CBT
Book reviews
Member workshops
About
Mission and Purpose
Website Policies
Membership Eligibility
Please Donate
December 21, 2024, 11:10:36 AM
Welcome,
Guest
. Please
login
or
register
.
1 Hour
5 Hours
1 Day
1 Week
Forever
Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins:
Kells76
,
Once Removed
,
Turkish
Senior Ambassadors:
EyesUp
,
SinisterComplex
Help!
Boards
Please Donate
Login to Post
New?--Click here to register
Books members most read
105
The High
Conflict Couple
Loving Someone with
Borderline Personality Disorder
Loving the
Self-Absorbed
Borderline Personality
Disorder Demystified
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
> Topic:
video taped a melt down
Pages: [
1
]
Go Down
« previous
next »
Print
Author
Topic: video taped a melt down (Read 798 times)
simplyasiam
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 372
video taped a melt down
«
on:
January 17, 2014, 05:12:44 PM »
last week the exgf ask me if I wanted to go out for a drink, I went. the night went like always, to much drinking and POW melt down. im not sure when she started acting like this after drinking but these days she really flips out after a few drinks.
ive seen this melt down three times in the past couple months. I knew it was coming. I turned the video cam on my cell on and sat it on the table as she blamed me for letting her move out of our home and into a rental trailer in a town she hates where the drugs are out of control. begging me not to leave her then saying she hates me a minute latter and it makes her happy to hit and kick me. she even says she knows shes not a victim she a predator and looks for ppl she can use and have control over. tape still running as she holds a cig to her arm and tells me she wants to feel pain and it takes all she has to not cut herself.
wrong of me to tape her without her know maybe but it is legal here as long as at least one person in the conversion knows the conversion is being taped.
why did I tape it? at the time it was because I knew she was going to flip out and didn't know how bad it would be, was making sure I had proof I did nothing wrong!
now when ever I think of contacting her I play the tape to remind me why I left
Logged
love4meNOTu
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 529
Re: video taped a melt down
«
Reply #1 on:
January 17, 2014, 05:20:03 PM »
No, no... I taped my xhwBPD screaming at me. (3 separate occasions) He doesn't know I did it, but I have it.
I haven't listened to them for quite a while, but I also have them archived on my computer with some rather "naked" pictures of him.
I will keep them until I feel there is no need to have them, but until then, they are insurance. I dare him to take me on.
L
Logged
In the depth of winter I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer.
~Albert Camus
fromheeltoheal
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Broken up, I left her
Posts: 5642
Re: video taped a melt down
«
Reply #2 on:
January 17, 2014, 05:35:34 PM »
It wouldn't be cool to post the vid to YouTube and send us the link. Wouldn't be cool at all. Just sayin... .
Logged
simplyasiam
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 372
Re: video taped a melt down
«
Reply #3 on:
January 17, 2014, 06:37:11 PM »
i wouldn't post it any where wouldn't use it in any way other than to remind myself why i shouldn't be around her
Logged
fromheeltoheal
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Broken up, I left her
Posts: 5642
Re: video taped a melt down
«
Reply #4 on:
January 17, 2014, 06:42:06 PM »
Quote from: simplyasiam on January 17, 2014, 06:37:11 PM
i wouldn't post it any where wouldn't use it in any way other than to remind myself why i shouldn't be around her
Yeah, I figured simply, and good for you. Just the morbid curiosity of fellow victims.
Two movies that do BPD very well are Prozac Nation and Thirteen, if we want Hollywood versions.
Logged
simplyasiam
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 372
Re: video taped a melt down
«
Reply #5 on:
January 17, 2014, 06:47:18 PM »
thank you i didn't know of any movies like that.
ill check into them.
Logged
santa
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 725
Re: video taped a melt down
«
Reply #6 on:
January 17, 2014, 09:40:39 PM »
Quote from: fromheeltoheal on January 17, 2014, 05:35:34 PM
It wouldn't be cool to post the vid to YouTube and send us the link. Wouldn't be cool at all. Just sayin... .
LMAO
Yeah. He totally
shouldn't
do that.
Logged
ogopogodude
^
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 513
Re: video taped a melt down
«
Reply #7 on:
January 18, 2014, 02:02:27 AM »
quote: "wrong of me to tape her without her know"
No, ... . it was not wrong to video tape. Do NOT ever feel that it is wrong. It is documentation. And that all it is... .
(why do some people thing that videotaping or audio-taping a temper rage is wrong or somehow a betrayal of the person that is raging?... . this perspective oh, so bewilders me. I have so many video tapes of my spouse's rages that I needed to document that nonsense.)
But I do not advocate downloading such a video of rage to youtube. No,... not at all.
Logged
RecycledNoMore
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 457
Re: video taped a melt down
«
Reply #8 on:
January 18, 2014, 03:08:45 AM »
Quote from: simplyasiam on January 17, 2014, 06:37:11 PM
i wouldn't post it any where wouldn't use it in any way other than to remind myself why i shouldn't be around her
Bugger
Just call me morbidly curious:)
Logged
really
Offline
Posts: 278
Re: video taped a melt down
«
Reply #9 on:
January 18, 2014, 03:35:27 AM »
I'm in. The alternative doesn't work
Logged
Moonie75
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 867
Re: video taped a melt down
«
Reply #10 on:
January 18, 2014, 12:47:21 PM »
During a rage episode from my ex, I calmly walked out of the house without responding or having any desire to defend myself. Just walked right out of it because I simply couldn't be ar$ed listening to it.
That Rage then took the form of three voice mails on my phone. (Including one threatening to get me beat up)
Those 3 voice mails have become a priceless 'reminding' tool in my detachment.
Logged
love4meNOTu
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 529
Re: video taped a melt down
«
Reply #11 on:
January 18, 2014, 12:58:37 PM »
Oh lordy, I have one where he is screaming ABOUT me on the phone to his one friend.
Now that one is priceless.
The day that man left my home was the best day of my life. I became alive again.
Logged
In the depth of winter I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer.
~Albert Camus
gary seven
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 163
Re: video taped a melt down
«
Reply #12 on:
January 18, 2014, 01:47:15 PM »
Simply:
In my state it is also only necessary for one party to consent to a taping. In fact I made a consult with a lwayer a few months ago who suggested I tape all the outrageous calls.
My suggestion to you is to get Carbonite or some other cloud service, in your own name, in your own account, and back up your laptop and cellphone. Password protect it with something outta left field. You may need this to substantiate in court if you get served, or locked up.
Remember to keep your work computer clean, other than documents you may need to type, or diaries of the day before's antics. No emails.
I agree as others have said it's a reliable touchstone to bring you right back into the fracas when it's a "good moment." For me , it will confirm what ultimately needs to happen, to split once and for all (I have three school aged kids and have been married 11 yrs).
Logged
delusionalxox
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Gay, lesb
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 352
Re: video taped a melt down
«
Reply #13 on:
January 18, 2014, 02:02:53 PM »
LOL, I wish I had done this!
My problem is I used to shout back! I would end up sounding like him by the end!
Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?
Pages: [
1
]
Go Up
Print
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
> Topic:
video taped a melt down
« previous
next »
Jump to:
Please select a destination:
-----------------------------
Help Desk
-----------------------------
===> Open board
-----------------------------
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
-----------------------------
=> Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
=> Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting
=> Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
-----------------------------
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
-----------------------------
=> Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
=> Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD
-----------------------------
Community Built Knowledge Base
-----------------------------
=> Library: Psychology questions and answers
=> Library: Tools and skills workshops
=> Library: Book Club, previews and discussions
=> Library: Video, audio, and pdfs
=> Library: Content to critique for possible feature articles
=> Library: BPDFamily research surveys
Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife
Loading...