I raged

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

I'm starting to question myself. Currently my uBPDex and I aren't talking. About 5 months ago I caught my gf talking to her ex on the phone for quite a few hours in the middle of the night. Since then every time something happens between us she ended up having another guy in the picture the whole time. I usually don't react all that much to things she does. But when it comes to being lied and cheated on I completely blow my lid and say the worst possible things I can think of to her. At the end of the day blowing my lid does nothing helpful especially since it gives her a good reason to be mad at me for what I said all we're able to concentrate on is what I said. So each time I end up being the one who feels bad and apologizing.

I'm just wondering if other people end up going off the deep end also or if there's something wrong with me too?

[willbegood]

I'm starting to question myself. Currently my uBPDex and I aren't talking. About 5 months ago I caught my gf talking to her ex on the phone for quite a few hours in the middle of the night. Since then every time something happens between us she ended up having another guy in the picture the whole time. I usually don't react all that much to things she does. But when it comes to being lied and cheated on I completely blow my lid and say the worst possible things I can think of to her. At the end of the day blowing my lid does nothing helpful especially since it gives her a good reason to be mad at me for what I said all we're able to concentrate on is what I said. So each time I end up being the one who feels bad and apologizing.

I'm just wondering if other people end up going off the deep end also or if there's something wrong with me too?

[Lucky Jim]

Hey willbegood, Cut yourself some slack.  We all respond in anger at times and later regret it.  Try to learn from it and pause next time before going down the same path.  By the way, have you broken up with your BPDex for good?  If so, time to limit contact with her?  Or are you hoping that you will get back together?  Lucky Jim

[willbegood]

Hey Jim!

It seem like we're broken up every other week. As of this weekend we're done again. Are we broken up for good? We should be. I wish things could work but I know they can't so I'm certainly trying to be broken up for good.

As for limiting contact, I'm always the one who has to initiate contact. Every time something happens, she digs into me so bad then I finally blow up and feel bad almost immediately. So even though I feel bad for what I said to her this past weekend, there's comes a point where I'm tired of her lying and cheating ways so I'm working on no contact.

I think I messed up months ago when she left me for her exbf. I was understanding that we all make mistakes and took her back. I think she saw that as a ticket to do what ever she wanted. And she knows that's the one thing that throws me over the edge now. And now that she knows how to strike my nerve she really goes in for the kill LOL!