So the"WAR" is officially over

[BP39]

Long time since i posted anything on here.

So its a wrap .im finally done, DIVORCED from xBPDw.and it was one hell of a ride.Im battle tested wounded but .MY flight has landed back in the safe zone.and i no longer have to fight... .

I came here about a year and half ago.in tow with 2 preteen kids dumped on our heads and our whole world turned upside down by EX BPD WIFE... good to say that  .as she went off on a family emergency to care for a loved one but found the new love of her life.and totally forgot she had a family.so i begged pleaded chased  begged some more.was recycled used and abused.but i made it out thanks to everyone here and my closest friends outside of the cyberworld. 15 years of marriage to one of these pwBPD .and it all ends with 11 words from the divorce judge "IS THERE ANYTHING THE COURT CAN DO TO RECONCILLE YOUR MARRIAGE"... .my answer came up rushing a clear "NO". It felt like i had been in a chained to rock .then all of a sudden the rock turned to sand and i was free to walk ... .my god its over.no more falling for "words" no more manilupulation  no more recycles. no more roller coaster ride.its all done i look on my "FINAL DIVORCE DECREE"and it says Divorce granted .And the last two sentences... .IT IS HEREBY ORDERD and the JUDGES NAME AND SIGNATURE

Things i learned... .1my self worth... .no one person in this world deserves to be treated like that... .never again

2 this is her disorder not mine... i did everything i can do to help its up to her.

3 she will never change

4 protect yourself first.

5never be codependent on another person for your happiness or anything else

6 take care of yourself no matter if you were with them 3 months or 30 years .you take control of your own self

7 always pay attention to red flags in the future

8 take these lessons and learn from them

9 you have choices ... you can try and help if you want... .but its totally up to them to change

10... .as said in number 6... .TAKE CARE OF YOU!

peace every one as i unbuckle my seatbealt and exit this plane ride... .THIS S@#T is finally over

[Want2know]

Good lessons learned - the hard way, as many of us here have. 

Freedom and moving forward... .standing on solid ground, baby steps towards a good life, using your new found knowledge - always good to hear. 

[123Phoebe]

BP39,

Congratulations on taking back your life!

Wishing you and your children the best,

Phoebe

[Phoenix.Rising]

BP39,

I'm glad to hear you are doing OK.  I followed your posts and always liked what you had to say.  You usually had a good attitude despite the craziness.  Take care.

Phoenix.Rising

[myself]

Panther, you know I'm happy for you and understand the hard road you've been riding on. You stood by your family and are still standing there, standing tall. There are many better days to come! I am sorry for your loss and yet thrilled by your gain. You have a big heart. Even when you were in pain you offered something good to others here, Myself included, thank you.

[catnap]

Thanks for the update BP, I remember your posts. I wish you and your children the best.   

I hope you hang around here every now and then to share your hard won knowledge with others that have just started their journey.

catnap

[Musiccitymess]

Congratulations to you. What a relief it must be. I'm probably a year away from mine being final (one year in already), so I am envious. Enjoy your time and your new life.