Over whelmed

[JamieA.]

Hello: First I want to apologize. I have been frantically working with my Grand kid's trying to help them reach some level of acceptance that there not the cause of the trouble there Mother is having. That there living with me is not a punishment, and that when there Mother can take good care of them then there cane be more time with her. I have not had much time to post. There Mother RR has reach a plea agreement with the court which will keep her out of jail, and the kid's with me for at least a while in hopes she will try to take her therapy to heart. We are having some communication problems with her as she has gotten some visitation with the kids but she can make demands that conflict with school, doctor, and there therapy schedules. We have asked for some mediation through CASA, and DHS and hope there can be some agreements made at least as a starting ground. Since her court settlement she as focused her anger at me when she finds that she is not as in control of the kids as she thing is should be, and can get very ugly about it. The worst thing is when she has the kids and she doesn't think she should have to return them she calls and has what I can only describe as a meltdown wit the kids there hearing her calling us names and what terrible people we are. My grandson 4y BW and granddaughter 7y JL ask me why doesn't Mommy like you, and how JL in afraid Mommy wont like them see us when they go home. She remembers Mommy use them as weapons be for and not letting them come to family events.

It's getting very tiring and my husband is wondering how much more we can take.

I don't know what to tell him any more, and I think I am here just to have some place I can vent with out being judged for a change. I hate knowing my daughter recent's me so much and that most of the other adults in my family just don't understand why I have to make things so difficult by not just giving her what she wants ie. the kid's. They where not the one's that had to go to the hospital when BW was abused.

I guess I don't have any thing else to say or maybe so much I just can't organize it right now.

So till I have the courage to try again I hope you all are safe and well.

Thank you for listening.              

[woodsposse]

 

Hi.  First off... .and remember this - you never have anything to apologize for.  Especially not here.  I think I can speak for everyone here when I say that you are most welcome to say whatever you want, whenever you want, how ever you want... .there is no judging here and we are all here to support you and each other.

Having a splintered family dynamic is rough.  Oh... .god do I know this.  The stories I could tell you of trying to raise my children under the cloud of their bio-mom... .I'm surprised I'm still somewhat sane.  It was rough. 

All I can say to this for you is... .do what you think is right and best for you and your grands.  It will all come together - probably sooner than you think.

I hope you stick around and post from time to time.  I would suggest checking out the family board (I don't have the link right handy or I would post it... .but I'm positive one of the other members will be so kind as to link it it for you).  Some of the members on that board can (and will) be able to speak more directly to your current environment.  But... .in the end - know you are not alone!