How do we address this

[Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse...]

Hi Rubies there is method in my madness.

1-i don't want to be seen as the rescuer of all financial problems

2-exdil regards us at times as a bank ie tells gd go ask gm and gd to buy it. I don't like it and will not be seen as her personal bank. Perhaps she to needs the message that gd is willing to work.  It will probably be lost on her though! !

3-gd can at times emulate her mother with an I don't want to work for anything attitude.  We are trying to show her that there is pride in working and buying for yourself. She was actually very happy with the idea. Gd does actually get lots from us.  I pay half her music as  mother refuses to and son doesn't earn much plus lots of incidentals. I think gd is relieved she doesn't have to ask mother. I may be wrong in all my reasoning but in my heart I feel we  are trying hard for her and I guess that is all we can do. I do appreciate all the help and suggestions from this site though and I was proud of gd for saying no to her mother for the $2. That is a start.

[mother in law]

Hi Rubies there is method in my madness.

1-i don't want to be seen as the rescuer of all financial problems

2-exdil regards us at times as a bank ie tells gd go ask gm and gd to buy it. I don't like it and will not be seen as her personal bank. Perhaps she to needs the message that gd is willing to work.  It will probably be lost on her though! !

3-gd can at times emulate her mother with an I don't want to work for anything attitude.  We are trying to show her that there is pride in working and buying for yourself. She was actually very happy with the idea. Gd does actually get lots from us.  I pay half her music as  mother refuses to and son doesn't earn much plus lots of incidentals. I think gd is relieved she doesn't have to ask mother. I may be wrong in all my reasoning but in my heart I feel we  are trying hard for her and I guess that is all we can do. I do appreciate all the help and suggestions from this site though and I was proud of gd for saying no to her mother for the $2. That is a start.