Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
May 19, 2025, 08:04:33 AM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Kells76, Once Removed, Turkish
Senior Ambassadors: EyesUp, SinisterComplex
  Help!   Boards   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
Books members most read
105
The High
Conflict Couple
Loving Someone with
Borderline Personality Disorder
Loving the
Self-Absorbed
Borderline Personality
Disorder Demystified

Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: what do I make of this?  (Read 486 times)
whitebackatcha
***
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Gay, lesb
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 221



« on: March 08, 2016, 03:46:23 PM »

Long distance gfBPD told me last night that she would be unable to talk to me today. When I asked why, she said she didn't want it to be a "thing," and was unwilling to discuss it. She said she told me in advance, and told me it wasn't anything I had done wrong, like I asked her to do with such things, and if I insisted on knowing anyway, I was "battering her into telling me." I told her the whole thing was very upsetting, and freaked me out, she asked me if I wanted space. I told her goodnight, because there wasn't anything left to be said.

I can't think of any normal reason why a person in a long-term relationship would do this. I have zero issue with her being busy, but this wasn't just that she would be busy and not around much. This was choosing zero contact, and declining to tell me why.

I fully believe that if she were cheating, she would end up confessing, so that isn't what I am concerned about. I just really don't like secrets, and can't understand why she would willfully choose this type of action at all.
Logged

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES
This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

Chilibean13
***
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 204


« Reply #1 on: March 09, 2016, 07:53:12 AM »

I would try not to read too much into it. It sounds like maybe she just needs a day to herself. Was she upset before she asked for this time off? Were you arguing? Most likely if you push the issue with her she will get angry but if you allow her the privacy, hopefully she will tell you in time what was going on.
Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?

Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife



Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2020, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!