At your next hearing in court make it a point to bring up this problem. Have paperwork of past failed efforts with you. What you want is for the judge to look at him and ask him to agree to date and time for the pickup. StbEx will of course agree. The you or your lawyer needs to say, "Judge, multiple prior attempts failed. So that we don't have to deal with this again, here is a proposed court order where I have just added the date and time he agreed to just now for her to pick up her personal belongings including her possessions specifically listed here. If we all take a minute to sign it and get it done then we won't be back here again and again over it."
Then, if you can get that, have the order in hand and get an officer to accompany you (called a "peace visit" to ensure peace and encourage compliance) to quickly gather your things. Perhaps bring someone to help you remove them. What would you do if some of your crucial items are "missing"?
My ex used HIPAA as a way to block my access to my son's child therapy records, in all, for over a year. We had separated when son was three years old and for the first 3 months I didn't even know about it until an insurance recertification letter arrived in my mail. At first she claimed I was a suspected child abuser and that worked well, the agency studiously gave me the cold shoulder for nearly a year - until court eventually had some evaluations in hand. At that point ex's strategy changed and claimed she feared endangerment because of her many comments to our child's therapist and agency. And of course the agency stonewalled me with this new wrinkle. By then I had already approached the court twice during hearing on other divorce issues, first the court assured me that in the temp order I had statutory rights to access my son's records, the second time the court got my ex to agree to sign papers with the agencies granting access. Of course she never did. So the third time I made a specific motion to get access to son's records. Court made my lawyer research HIPAA law and rules. Finally we had a hearing and the magistrate signed the motion as an order. I picked up some 200 pages of records within two days. My lawyer had told me it would be mostly blacked out, but it wasn't. I didn't see my initial letters to the agency, not sure why they weren't kept. Of course, the agency was silent about apologies, they weren't going to expose themselves to further litigation.
Several months later when my ex raged at the pediatrician's staff and got herself 'fired' (letter to her as temp custodial parent stated they were "withdrawing services" but I was never notified. And ex didn't notify me either, of course. When I called the pediatricians a week or two later they refused to talk to me, referring me to their lawyer. The lawyer also stated they couldn't talk to me, but obliquely asked whether I wanted to request son's records? Of course I asked for his records. No charge, too, staff was silent but very helpful. Yes, my ex, remembering her prior success with this delay tactic, had claimed HIPAA issues.
Your lawyer should still bring with him a motion for Contempt of Court or whatever else is appropriate. If he isn't reasonable, then maybe submitting that to the judge (you might have to do that beforehand and get it served too?) that will cut some wind out of his sails. And likely the judge will welcome some additional leverage to get him to behave and sign the already prepared settlement papers right then and there.
Remember, NEVER agree to his promises to review it, think about it and sign later. That is another typical DELAY tactic. Whether it is conscious or subconscious, who cares? The end result is even more DELAY.
My story... .THREE times on three separate court appearances that were months apart I complained to the magistrate that I couldn't get access to my son's therapy records. We were mid-divorce and the first time the magistrate stated I had statutory rights clearly stated in the temporary order and thought that settled the problem. It didn't. The second time my then-stbEx promised the magistrate to sign releases or whatever so I could have access. The magistrate again thought that settled the problem. Never happened! Third time was my motion to ORDER the therapy agency to release son's records. Finally, the magistrate signed it into an order and the agency immediately complied. In all, I was blocked from those records for a year. (Yes, it was filled with numerous child abuse allegations, not from preschooler son but from obstructive then-stbEx.
I learned my lesson, if it's not signed right there in court, it probably won't happen! Learn from my experience... .the only sure thing is getting it done while you're right there in court!
