Small victory ( sort of)

[almostvegan]

I dislike rap

Music. I find it just awful. My dh agrees. We don't allow it in our home. My d sees no problem with it. We've asked her never to play it aloud and have gotten her as many headphones as she needs ( they keep breaking).

My d plays music while cleaning out her pets cage. Guess what she's playing? Yup. Rap.

Me: please turn that off

D: it's not rap

Me: I hear it. I'm pretty sure it's rap.

D: it's not about killing people or raping women. It's about... .  

Me: it's rap and its not allowed in this home.

D: why not? It's not offensive lyrics

Me: the  rap culture is based on things that we don't approve of. No matter what the lyrics say we find the rap tunes offensive. Please turn it off.

D: ok ill shut it off as soon as I wash my hands

Me: thank you. And thank you for not shouting or getting all upset.

D: yeah yeah.

Five minutes later she's listening to Adam sandler hanukah song and we are both laughing at it!

Small tiny miracle.

Now:

D: it's too late to do Zumba

( she's been doing it nightly and has lost 8 pounds)

Me: no it's not. You've been doing so well with it. Don't lose your momentum.

D: if I do it will you let me stay up a little later so I can work on my novel?

Me: howuch later?

D: 20/30 minutes?

Me: deal but get started now.

D: in 2 minutes ill go do Zumba.

Me: sigh... .  

D: I have 1 more minute on the clock. Don't complain please.(!)

Well it's been one minute. She's gone to change.

Stay tuned... .  

Fingers crossed.

AV

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[qcarolr]

small victories are GOOD. Especially when you have more than one in the same day - hope these keep building for you both.

qcr  

[lbjnltx]

 

I used to keep a set of ear plugs in my car for those long drives to therapy every Tuesday... .  worse than acceptable lyric rap... .  the ones where it feels like Satan is screaming at you through the radio

Smart phone solved that problem.

[trainwreck4]

I am amazed at the small things that make us all a little happy!  This does make us appreciate the little things in life some people overlook!  

[almostvegan]

Updated:

She did Zumba. She took a fast shower( another miracle. Usually bathing is a 90 minute process).

She did her writing and was in bed by 11:30

Yet here we are after 9 and she's still in bed with no signs of movement.

Sigh... .  

Peace everyone.

AV

[jellibeans]

My daughter likes rap too and I let her listen to it as long as the language is okay... .  if not then I turn it off.

Her bedtime is 10pm... .  she needs to plug her phone in the game room and is not allowed to have it in her room at night... .  she does this pretty consistantly but it she doesn't she loses her phone. I don't have to nag her constantly to go to bed because she know she will lose her phone. Losing her phone is like losing one of her arms.

As far as exercise... .  I have suggested that she go for a run, something she used to do all the time but if she doesn't then it is her who will have the consquences of not exercising.

I am surprised you can have that many encounters with your daughter without her getting upset... .  if all these things had happened in one evening I think my dd furstration would have been high. I think picking your battles are important. I think if there are some consquences (some Natural) then I don't need to be so controling over what she does and what she listens to. Reduce the conflict.

I save mine for school issues but even now I have relaxed a bit on that because if she doesn't do her work she is not going to pass and it will be her the suffers for that not me.

[almostvegan]

This was a surprise. I was expecting a huge blow up but like you said, pick your battles. Rap is unacceptablein our home.  It was a worthy battle to me.

Being that she's homeschooled our chances of butting heads is pretty high. This was a small victory  for me.

Peace