fact:
She walked out on me
conscious decision to originate a state of mind influenced by outside stimuli:
I know I will find it hard to trust people in the future, no matter how hard I try.
fact:
she left me
conscious decision to originate a state of mind influenced by outside stimuli:
I am going to fear abandonment from now on.
fact:
she met somebody else
conscious decision to originate a state of mind influenced by outside stimuli:
makes me feel distrustful and suspicious
fact:
I have no previous experience
conscious decision to originate a state of mind influenced by outside stimuli:
what I now know is only intense, fast-paced, rushed relationships - head over heels very early on.
I feel like, even though I do not have BPD, all my experience of relationships comes from her - so this is now what I know as normal.
what you now know is the behaviour patterns of someone who suffers from BPD. "intense", "fast-paced", "rushed relationships" are red flags to be aware of when entering a future conjunction.
what you now know is "normal" from someone who has a thought disorder and if presented with the same behaviour, you will be more equipped to make better decisions based on your "experience".
its all a state of mind