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Waddams
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« Reply #1 on: March 19, 2013, 08:52:24 AM » |
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In my jursidiction here, you pretty much have to show there's a genuine harm being experienced by the kids first. That means you gotta wait for things to get bad. Him just moving in wouldn't be enough. Him moving in AND causing harm to the kids that can be documented has to start happening. Things like slipping grades, misbehaving, getting caught with drugs, run-in's with the cops/neighbors/etc. Or drug use or other illegal behavior in front of the kids, but that's hard to document unless you get the kids to testify or somehow record it themselves.
Basically child neglect, abuse, endangering, contributing to delinquency, etc. has to actually be occurring. The court here won't recognize the potential of it as a reason to make a change.
As for being prepared, perhaps talk to a lawyer, talk the boys regularly, tell them they are safe in coming to you for help if they need, have the local authorities on speed dial, talk to the cops that cover her area, let them know you're concerned and ask them how to initiate a wellness check, etc.
Telling her who is and isn't allowed to live in her house is probably not the best way to go about it. With no harm in actual progress, to a judge it looks controlling. Or would to the judges here. My advice would instead be to express the concern for your children's well being and ask for updates on the situation as it relates to them. And tell her you can take them anytime if something goes haywire and they need to be gotten out of there for any particular incident. These are ideas... . focus on what you can do to help protect the kids, not on what she does or doesn't do, in your communication with here. Just my humble opinion.
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