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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means finding the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tensions.
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Author Topic: Light topic: Sharing baby pictures  (Read 570 times)
motherof1yearold
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« on: March 24, 2013, 03:25:41 PM »

Today I was going through all current baby pictures that I take on my time of my toddler. Unfortunately my computer space is literally COMPLETELY taken up so I had figured I would back up videos onto youtube since disks were taking far too long on my lagged out laptop. I texted BPD ex husband and told him I would be sharing our tot's videos on youtube so both families can see . He replies to me "UM NOO." and I replied back saying, "well I didn't see anything wrong with the idea! " (it's not like I'm asking for reciprocation ! - and he replies AGAIN saying " OH well argue if you want to but I think it is a very terrible idea! "

I guess I'm not going to reply back, I just was trying to be nice and make sure everybody  got the pictures and videos of the baby. I suppose he doesn't care that much about precious memories.

Eh, I wonder how other's handle this? I assume just keeping all pics and videos to yourself?
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Blazing Star
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« Reply #1 on: March 24, 2013, 10:53:17 PM »

Perhaps he has reservations about putting videos etc on the internet for everyone and anyone to see? That the photos and videos can be used by anyone for anything once they are 'out of your hands' - paranoid perhaps, but there is a dark side the the internet. My partner feels a bit the same. We have family all over the world too, so like to share some, we don't do facebook, and limit the photos/videos we do put up elsewhere.

You could share them on vimeo and password protect them, or do limited invite only access on youtube?

Love Blazing Star
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motherof1yearold
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« Reply #2 on: March 25, 2013, 07:16:53 AM »

I wasn't specific with him that it would be a private account, just like how we handled facebook pictures of the baby.

I haven't heard of vimeo , but thanks I will check that out.
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Faded
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« Reply #3 on: March 29, 2013, 10:22:02 AM »

I think he is right to have some sort of reservations.

Nothing majorly but i dont htink putting videos/photos on the world wide web unless all parties are agreed is a good idea.

I certainly wouldnt want anyone uploading any videos/photos of myself in a family scenario.


I can see why there are reservations as you wont be uploading only vids/photos containing only yourself.

That said your ex will have the right to have the videos taken down just by request to youtube.


If all you want to do is back up your lifes images and videos for memories sake get yourself an external hard-drive.

Very cheap for a 1TB HD now days.

As you say your laptop is lagged out then uploading these to the internet take a while.

Transfering them to an external HD will take moments.

If you feel the need to share such images with family/friends then you could email them or indeed burn them to disc(CD/DVD) and give copies to your friends and family.


Using an HD as back up is a much safer way to store your files and gives you access to them when ever you like and allows you to share with others 1 on 1.

Smiling (click to insert in post)
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Thunderstruck
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« Reply #4 on: March 29, 2013, 11:31:24 AM »

There's a privacy setting on youtube that you can upload the video and no one can see it unless you give them the direct link to it. It won't show up on searches or your profile or anything.
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Surnia
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« Reply #5 on: March 29, 2013, 12:44:15 PM »

Even if you could set youtube on privacy, I would not recommend to use it in a conflicted divorce.

I agree with Faded about external HD.
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motherof1yearold
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« Reply #6 on: March 29, 2013, 04:29:42 PM »

Thanks guys , Im' going to have to get it done quickly  before my computer crashes. I have 30gig pictures and videos and I don't want them compressed so I'll take it in to my job for them work their magic (I work in electronics)

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