Early signs of BPD?

[DKK]

Hello everyone,

I would like to ask a question about my D10.

I know she is young, but I am seeing similar behavior in her to my partner and two sons, 18, 16, and think she may be in early stages of BPD.

For the last year I have witnessed an increase in doodling, which currently she is doing on her thighs. She also has a problem concentrating on anything for longer than five minutes, and becomes highly agitated when she is asked to finish something like her homework. she is increasingly having distant episodes, and it takes a few moments before she registers she is being spoken to. She also can be in very highly excited states, and will hit or pinch, which sometimes is difficult to stop.

This type of behavior was obvious in my two S when they were younger. One of those is now displaying quite obvious signs (S18), the other is also displaying some signs and has actually asked me for help because he 'does not feel right' , I have taken him to the doctors and he has been referred to a young persons mental health clinic by our doctor.

So in short, is my D displaying early signs of BPD?

DKK

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[lbjnltx]

Perhaps DKK, it also sounds like adhd which can present very similarly to BPD in some aspects in children and adolescents.

Have you had her tested for adhd/add?

[vivekananda]

I would like to add that according to the recently published Australian Guidelines on the Clinical Management of BPD, 'there is not enough data to support the application of diagnostic criteria for BPD to a child under 12.' However, many of us knew something wasn't right with our children, from a very young age.

It may be that BPD is not an appropriate diagnosis, but nevertheless, the skills we learn as parents can be of immense help in raising difficult children.

While you explore the idea of early BPD, you may wish to invest in an excellent book for any parent, that directly addresses the need for improved communication styles with children. It was written by G & J Lundsberg, "I don't have to make everything all better". There is also a book on boundary setting that is highly recommended: "Boundaries - when to say yes, how to say no to take control of your life" by H. Cloud and J. Townsend.

Vivek    

[Rapt Reader]

Hi, DKK     Even if your daughter doesn't have BPD, if her behaviors and symptoms are interfering with her schoolwork, socialization and/or anxiety levels, it still would be beneficial to maybe have her checked out and diagnosed... . My dBPDs36 had problems the very first day of Kindergarten, not being able to concentrate in a school atmosphere, getting lost all over the place, ending up all by himself on the swings when the rest of the kids knew when to get back to class. Now, that was in 1982 when there was "no such thing" as ADD, so there was no diagnosis to give him; everyone from the class teacher to the principal decided he was being disruptive and a "cut-up" or class clown. He was constantly being disciplined for behaviors that he had no control over (and believe me, he was tortured in his heart and mind trying to fit in and do the right thing), and I do believe that the trauma of being in this world without a diagnosis (and treatment) of the ADD until he was 20 is what led to his BPD... .

I have sort of made it my mission in life to tell parents when their children have some sort of behavioral problem, to please get them diagnosed and treated for whatever it is... . Yeah, having them be "labeled" does sorta suck (the biggest protest from parents I usually hear), but left undiagnosed and untreated, do you want your child to end up like mine did? Depressed, anxious, suicidal and abusing drugs in order to self-medicate the cold cruel world into something somewhat tolerable? I know that you are here, questioning, so that tells me that you care enough about your daughter to get her tested and helped... . For that, I am so happy and proud of you; you are such a good Dad!     My son would counsel you exactly the same 

   Rapt Reader