crash plan rather than giving in

[simplyasiam]

im not sure what it would be or how it would work but maybe, we could come up with a group of ppl or even one person online friend or someone in everyday life we can turn to instead of dealing with this alone.

i think the alone is what big part of what holds some of us to the ex with BPD.

having someone that understands that you could call or even txt when the lows hit, or when contact comes. maybe this could help healing.

i know having family i can talk to helps some but they dont understand what this life was really like.

would like to know what you all think about this.

[Perfidy]

I know everyone around me is pretty worn out from this. I don't want to talk to anyone close to me about it anymore. I've already run off a couple of my friends. Wore them out and my depression is a major turn off. Met a couple ladies but I am pretty sketchy about that. Strangely enough they seem to need rescuing. Would be nice to talk with a live person once in a while but I don't know how good of an idea it is. The Internet is a kind of fertile ground for scams and people harvesting.

[Learning_curve74]

There are a handful of friends that I opened up to about my BPDex. They know about BPD and the BS involved. A couple of them are actually mutual friends of me and BPDex, and they were very understanding even without taking sides. I try not to burn anybody out, there are about 4 friends that I trusted totally with all the details. They are usually checking on me for which I am eternally grateful!

Counseling and/or therapy is an option if you are not seeing any professionals. After I found out about BPD, I knew I couldn't handle it without some professional guidance, and even then it's been extremely hard as everybody here knows.

If you are feeling codependent, there is codependents anonymous which might be worthwhile considering.

[talithacumi]

I don't talk about it with anyone anymore EXCEPT my therapist and the people on this board.

When I'm triggered, I sit with the feeling until it passes and/or write myself through it.

If I'm triggered bad enough to even want to try make contact again, I disconnect myself from the internet at the source, lock my phone in the filing cabinet, and throw the key in the pool so I have no choice but to sit with that feeling as well until it passes.

When I crash, I want to crash into ME now. Who knows, maybe I'll end up shaking something loose that'll help me move just a little further forward in my own healing/recovery.