Traits BPD have to have to be diagnosed or suspected of having BPD

[Cipher13]

I am struggle with a few things with completley understand the BPD traits.

Common ones I have heard of are:

Suicidal/self hurting

Affairs

Lying


Of the other traits I have read about these sem most common and my wife shares none of them... at soem point in here life maybe but not with me. Does that mean maybe she isnt?

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[Wrongturn1]

If I recall, under DSMIV, a diagnosis could be made if the person exhibited 5 of the 9 symptoms, so failing to exhibit a few diagnostic criteria would not rule out a diagnosis. 

[Mono No Aware]

These are The 9:

1)   Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment.

2)   Unstable or intense interpersonal relationships, with marked shifts in attitudes towards others (from idealization to devaluation or from clinging dependency to isolation and avoidance), and prominent patterns of manipulation of others.

3)   Marked and persistent identity disturbance manifested by an unstable self-image or a sense of self.

4)   Impulsiveness in at least two areas that are potentially self-destructive.

5)   Recurrent suicidal threats, gestures, or behavior, or self-mutilating behaviors.

6)   Affective instability due to marked reactivity of mood with severe episodic shifts to depression, irritability, or anxiety, usually lasting a few hours and rarely more than a few days.

7)   Chronic feelings of emptiness.

8)   Inappropriate, intense anger, or lack of control of anger, e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights.

9)   Transient, stress-related paranoid thoughts or symptoms of severe dissociation.


My uBPDw (undiagnosed Borderline Personality Disorder wife) displays 7 of them daily or weekly, and the other 2 only when having a big dysregulation meltdown (which is due any day now... .)

She's undiagnosed because she hates the idea of seeking therapy.

[Cipher13]

1)   Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment. YES

2)   Unstable or intense interpersonal relationships, with marked shifts in attitudes towards others (from idealization to devaluation or from clinging dependency to isolation and avoidance), and prominent patterns of manipulation of others. Sor t of but not prevalant it seems

3)   Marked and persistent identity disturbance manifested by an unstable self-image or a sense of self. YES

4)   Impulsiveness in at least two areas that are potentially self-destructive. I don't think so

5)   Recurrent suicidal threats, gestures, or behavior, or self-mutilating behaviors. Said she did as a teen. Not since I have known her (14 years)

6)   Affective instability due to marked reactivity of mood with severe episodic shifts to depression, irritability, or anxiety, usually lasting a few hours and rarely more than a few days. YES

7)   Chronic feelings of emptiness. YES

8)   Inappropriate, intense anger, or lack of control of anger, e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights. At me yes

9)   Transient, stress-related paranoid thoughts or symptoms of severe dissociation.

YES panic and axiety issues since young teen.

So I guess thats  that.  Know helps... .sort of. It tells you that you are not loosing your mind as you thought. But it then makes you say now what!