WORKING ON ME NOW

[Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse...]

It's been about a month since we "broke up" and it's been 10 days since I responded to anything. I blocked her on all social media, and blocked her from calling or texting. She still manages to get a few voicemails through from other numbers, and emails from new addresses, but, I just delete them without listening to or reading them. I know what they'll say, so I don't even bother. If a guy knocked on your door and said "if you open the door I'm gonna kick the crap out of you!", would you open the door?  Exactly!  So why read or listen to anything they say? 

I started therapy and just yesterday I told my mom about my situation. Something I NEVER would have done a month ago. I even opened up a little about not feeling loved by my dad who died a few years ago. My goal is open communication with my family, and NO communication with HER. And mental and physical health. As much as I want to hate this situation, I can't help but be thankful it happened, because now I'm working on Me.

I hope this somewhat inspires you. They are not your world. You are your world. Make it a good one.

[StandUpGuy]

It's been about a month since we "broke up" and it's been 10 days since I responded to anything. I blocked her on all social media, and blocked her from calling or texting. She still manages to get a few voicemails through from other numbers, and emails from new addresses, but, I just delete them without listening to or reading them. I know what they'll say, so I don't even bother. If a guy knocked on your door and said "if you open the door I'm gonna kick the crap out of you!", would you open the door?  Exactly!  So why read or listen to anything they say? 

I started therapy and just yesterday I told my mom about my situation. Something I NEVER would have done a month ago. I even opened up a little about not feeling loved by my dad who died a few years ago. My goal is open communication with my family, and NO communication with HER. And mental and physical health. As much as I want to hate this situation, I can't help but be thankful it happened, because now I'm working on Me.

I hope this somewhat inspires you. They are not your world. You are your world. Make it a good one.

[hopealways]

Bravo to you! Keep up the great work. I believe you will have a quicker than most recovery because you accept the cycle that she will put you through once again and have no delusions about it, and, most importantly, have identified the true source of all the pain which is the lack of love you felt growing up.  That is what you miss, not her. Great that you are seeing a therapist as well.  Many do not know enough about BPD so do not be discouraged about that.  You have been in the relationship so you know darn well she's BPD and all the signs you endured.

[DragoN]

They are not your world. You are your world. Make it a good one.

Well said. Good on you for going  into therapy. Found it incredibly helpful. FOO issues and BPD SO issues, grueling sessions and worth every tear.

Finding the Balance and walking the tight rope around a BPD is a lesson in hanging onto sanity on the razor's edge of oblivion.

[froggy]

Good for you

I've started focusing on my own issues and I have many of my own for the first time in my life and have been feeling happier for it.

I'm still in my relationship. ... for now.

Tough to look and see HOW codependent and enabling I've become in 33years... how little sence of self I have.

Time to rebuild me

[GreenMango]

Great news!