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BPDFamily.com
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Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
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Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
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I done something silly.
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Topic: I done something silly. (Read 427 times)
Eric1
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 540
I done something silly.
«
on:
December 27, 2013, 06:18:42 AM »
I emailed her Christmas Day. I felt the urge and I just done it.
All it said was that I hoped everything was going well for her & she was enjoying the new job. Wished her a happy Christmas & that was it.
I obviously haven't had any reply.
Silly, silly boy.
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Hannibal Heyes
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What is your sexual orientation: Gay, lesb
Posts: 39
Re: I done something silly.
«
Reply #1 on:
December 27, 2013, 06:37:25 AM »
so understandable, unitl we we find the strenght to let go, and realise they're mentally ikk, there's no clusure, I guess... .
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Eric1
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 540
Re: I done something silly.
«
Reply #2 on:
December 27, 2013, 06:50:13 AM »
It just makes me sad, in an unhappy way.
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Littleopener
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 73
Re: I done something silly.
«
Reply #3 on:
December 27, 2013, 07:05:21 AM »
I know exactly how you feel. I did the same. Wished him and his family all the best. No reply. It's like being punished for being a good person.
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Pearl55
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 386
Re: I done something silly.
«
Reply #4 on:
December 27, 2013, 07:23:48 AM »
Eric
You are not silly, she is crazy. Accept that to be able to move on. In fact in the entire relationship they think we are stupid but does it really matter what they think?
I don't give a monkey what does a f#% up person think.
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Learning_curve74
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Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 1333
Re: I done something silly.
«
Reply #5 on:
December 27, 2013, 08:38:38 AM »
It's perfectly understandable to want to wish her a happy Christmas. It's also okay to feel bad when you don't get a reply.
Please look to the sidebar to the right. Notice how it says "Attachment leads to suffering, detachment leads to freedom"? When you can offer a kindness to her without expectation of anything in return, then you can avoid suffering. But first you must heal to reach that ability.
Always take care of yourself.
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laelle
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Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 1737
Re: I done something silly.
«
Reply #6 on:
December 27, 2013, 08:46:03 AM »
Brush it off Eric,
We have all done that at one time or another. You have given away nothing of yourself other than wish her a Merry Christmas to which she chose not to respond.
I know it is very invalidating, but do not take it personally. It was a very kind gesture on your part to which she could not meet equally...
It is all take and no give with them, why should a heartfelt Christmas email be any different? You cant control her, but you can control your response to her actions...
Take your power back, you are just as strong as you were before you sent that email, and know that your a great person who cares.
I hope that you had a Merry Christmas
Laelle
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