How do you handle it when your exBPD is flaunting their new r/s in your face

[Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse...]

she was doing that, and it got me angry, sad, frustrated. i thought i was doing fine, but her showing it off is getting to me

[Pinoypride18]

she was doing that, and it got me angry, sad, frustrated. i thought i was doing fine, but her showing it off is getting to me

[MrFox]

How is she showing it off?  My exBPDgf used social media to do the same thing to me (and may still be, but I have no clue).  My solution was to stop looking at anything having to do with her.  I also informed anyone that I socialize with that knows her or anything about her not speak to me about her.  That best way to deal with it is to ignore it.  What she is doing and what she is doing is no longer your concern or your business.

[Pinoypride18]

dude you are right, my roommate showed me pictures of her and the replacement. i really shouldnt have looked and i really should tell everyone to stop telling me things about her. i really should stop keeping tabs. i was doing good until i did that. aight thanks lesson learned stop keeping tabs and tell people to stop telling me things about her

[growing_wings]

yeah it gets me too. seems like some of our expwPBD's like using social media to "show off" how happy they are, mine is doing it too. she even contacts my friends and write in their walls, oh life is so pretty for her. I know this is a tool she used when i was with her to show how "great" she was with thers and even if i know this, it will gets me...

waht do i do?

Social media:

I DONT see, i have unfollowed all our mutual friends (if i un follow them i dont see what she posts to them or what they post to her)... .   but i still use my FB for my friends... . and for me.

When friends or people tell me about her

friends come and tell me stuff, i hurt deeply inside when they tell me about her, but i dont ask anymore... i dont ask... .

go NC for good, that means dont look at her, dont look at her social media, dont dont dont... . dont hear about her... doing so, means pain if the b/u wound is still open ... .

that works for me. Her life, MY life...

[Chunk Palumbo]

You gotta have a Social Media blackout. Delete them from everything.

Trust me, I had her flaunt new men in my face for close to nine years. Over the course of that nine, I loved her just as much as I did at Year One. The jealousy was through the roof, and it'd make my blood boil.

She did things like be deep in IM conversation with me, and change her picture to one of her holding hands with the guy she cheated on me with. Send me pictures of her new man's tongue down her throat, purposefully make plans in my town, etc. all while pretending not to know what she's doing.

The only way to get better is to go NC and realize the calculated intention behind the mind-games. Realize that they're off doing whatever they're doing, having sex to fill the void and not giving a crap about you unless you can give them something - be it attention, drama or whatever.

We always talk about the importance of NC. But it really, really works. No checking, no reading old convos/emails, no nothing.

[arielleis]

she was doing that, and it got me angry, sad, frustrated. i thought i was doing fine, but her showing it off is getting to me

Very very very great question.

I am one of those who are being flaunted the new victim. Some of you may be familiar with my story but when I broke up with her, she professed all of her love for 2 weeks non stop, until a Friday. Then, on a Sunday, she writes me to let me know that she has committed to a relationship and that she "loved me very much". Fu$%ing slore.

Then she starts posting all over Facebook and Instagram (in public) that she loves him, that she is loving life, every meal they have yada yada. When I blocked her from Fb, she removed all the pics. When I unblocked her, she put them back again. That was my closure. It was all BS. And it will be.

I believe every BPD victim serves a purpose. I am what she will never be: driven, with integrity, responsible, and I know what love is. She doesn't. His role is, in my opinion, the rebound who will make her show me how much I am supposeldy "missing out" on.

AL