financial detachment

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

Hello

The car my exBPDgf is driving belongs to our family trust.  Do I pull it from the trust and give it to her or take it back?

If I just give it to her then I am perpetuating her entitlement process.  If I take it back then I am a jerk.   Either way I will be villified.

Any toughts?

Thank you All.

[tucsonstrom]

Hello

The car my exBPDgf is driving belongs to our family trust.  Do I pull it from the trust and give it to her or take it back?

If I just give it to her then I am perpetuating her entitlement process.  If I take it back then I am a jerk.   Either way I will be villified.

Any toughts?

Thank you All.

[paul16]

You indicate gf as opposed to wife. She is not part of your family and the car should not be owned by the family trust if there is no benefit to the family. Taking it out of the trust and giving it to her is an option but that decision would be yours based on the information that you have. Did you give her the car and title it in the name of the trust? Or were you just letting her use one of your cars?

[tucsonstrom]

I let her use it and it is still titled and insured by the trust.  Am I being petty or realistic?

[LookinInside_ToShareOut]

IMO, realistic.  I don't see what claim she would have to the car. Any smearing that could come from reclaiming it would be minimally hurtful at most.  Anyone who knows the situation at all would understand taking the car back.

[tucsonstrom]

So what is the best way to retrieve the vehicle?   I am resolved to no contact.  If I contact her it will blow-up.  If I call AAA and have it towed then she flame on and tell everyone how, "I kicked her out pennieless and took back the car."    But really, I don't feel responsible for well-being.   Her mother has revealed her true self.    I believe her mom has created all these behaviors and it is their problem to solve not mine. 

Any thoughts?

[MammaMia]

tucson

What do you mean that her mother has created the issues your gf has?  Is your gf not an adult, capable of her own thoughts and behaviors? 

Why are you so worried about what others might think?  If the vehicle was on loan and you own it, you have every right to take it back if you are no longer together.  Legally your gf is not entitled to keep it without your permission. 

[Perfidy]

If you are in az, and you hand the keys of a vehicle to anyone, you have very little to stand on legally. Have you asked her to return it? The law can't help you if you willingly gave her the keys and you tell the cops that. It becomes a civil matter.

[tucsonstrom]

If you are in az, and you hand the keys of a vehicle to anyone, you have very little to stand on legally. Have you asked her to return it? The law can't help you if you willingly gave her the keys and you tell the cops that. It becomes a civil matter.

No I have not ask for its return.  So if I just hand the title over and limit all liability exposure I just may detach sooner rather than risk another rage.?  What if I just call AAA nad have it towed?   Can I get in trouble for stealing my property?